Weekend Update: Not Quite SNL

Often, my blog posts consist of short essays, but as I get my behind to practice more often, it's easier to have relevant personal updates, such as today's. Thanks to some great support from league-mates and a recent opening in my schedule, I've been able to make more time for derby-related activities.

On Friday, I had my first evening in LOCO London's new practice space. Because my anxiety and schedule has often led to me having long stretches off-skate, I often hang out with the new skaters, refreshing the skills and body memory affected by my absences. That night, I finally seem to have mastered the proper T-stop and I've had some promising developments toward my transitions. My most commonly used stop is a kind of wonky snowplow with most of my weight on my right foot and resulting in a slight turn to the left. Given the demands of reffing, mastering the T-stop and transitions are a must and I'm happy to have made some progress. London's more experienced refs often double as skate coaches and they're patient, insightful teachers. Getting back to practice was a sweaty pleasure.

On the following Saturday, LOCO Stratford and Kitchener bouted in New Hamburg, Ontario, painting the town pink and green, supplemented by skaters from other LOCO teams. I had to be in London for a birthday party (my own) but checking out the bout photos after was kind of a thrill. The excellent Joe Mac produces great photos and we look pretty darn good.

Then Sunday happened. I tried skating on Sunday afternoon, but was too sore to keep it up. Naturally, I did what any skater does when it's no longer time to roll. I alternated watching other skaters' techniques and form and looking at my smartphone. Realizing how much I've lost from spending so much time off skate has been difficult. I need to rebuild my ankle strength, get back my balance, and work on my endurance for outside pack reffing just to name a few. I'm looking forward to spending more time on-skate and getting those things back.

It goes to show that you don't have to kick your own ass every time you practice (unless you want to) but that maintaining frequent skate time is crucial to avoiding that slow creep of lost skills and physical condition. The derby-ready body is conditioned by the time we spend on skates. Too much time in your street shoes and you'll have to work to win that body back. Luckily, you've got a team behind you, sometimes coming up at fast speeds.

Upcoming excitement includes continuing to study the ref handbook, a bout on October 13th, and a LOCO skater, NSO and ref clinic in November. It's a good time to be back on wheels.

The Meme Team: Otters and Zebras, Oh My

Today, consider the otter and the zebra, both noble animals. Then you add some derby and you get two of my favourite roller derby memes.

Exhbit the First: Roller Derby Otter

One of the earlier derby memes I ever saw, the roller derby otter's gaze seems to embody the stark horrors, joys and rueful self-awareness associated with derby. Its cousin, the Fresh Meat Otter, specializes in the embarassments of being a new otter on the track.

Exhibit the Second: Roller Derby Zebra

This one's for the referees. This zebra's soulful eyes and clear understanding of the importance of proper safety gear tells the often exhilarating, sometimes soul-crushing story of the derby referee. Let it do an equipment check on you to see if you have a heart. 

Zebra Love

The zebra was one of my favourite animals when I was a kid. It was like a horse, but with a cooler paint job. Today, the zebras I interact with are human ones - the fine referees of roller derby. Assuming you're not playing renegade derby, you need refs if you want to play the game. And derby is a damn complicated game.

Some of my favourite leagues, like Terminal City, list their refs as a kind of team all their own. When it comes down to it, refs have to pass their own skills testing, they have to know WFTDA rules inside and out and they have to deal with derby girls. It's not glamourous, but it is pretty bad-ass. As the Montreal Roller Derby Referees' page says, "No pain and no glory, not vain nor scary, just a simple concoction: Respect, rules and execution." Our zebras are part of what makes the derby machine run. They tell you that you're the lead jammer, they send you and your booty-shorts to the penalty seat.

When I first started practicing, I was struck by the seeming fact that refs were almost always male. Women's derby has two particular roles men can play, namely referees and coaches. At first, it irked me that these positions of authority were held by guys. Couldn't women ref? Couldn't women coach? Wasn't patriarchy one of the things we went to derby to escape, at least for the duration of a two-minute jam? It bothered me that a sport I identified as feminist just seemed to reinscribe tired gender stereotypes by having the women in fishnets and the men in positions of power. I've since learned that lots of women do both of these things, but the majority of women prefer to skate because that's what they came for. Skating is the sexy part. Reffing is a different kind of hard.

My league has several refs we know and love and these range from home-grown officials to volunteers we've borrowed from other leagues. My refs have taught me how to manage the penalty box and my refs have shown me how to handle my gear better. Referees are crucial resources for players, especially new ones, to learn about the game, their gear, and skating technique. So, in short, I say show your zebras some love today and ask them a question. These folks know their stuff.