That's How We Became The Derby Bunch

Yesterday, LOCO held its second annual Skate-A-Thon. I've blogged previously about the event, which features both derby girls and picnics. Together, LOCO's skaters raised $950 dollars, 25% of which goes to YMCA Strong Kids with the remainder going to the league. Skaters from LOCO raised pledges with the promise that they would skate around London's park walkways for an hour, before settling down to eat burgers and remarkably good desserts.

Photo credit: Natalie 'Vegas' Buragina

I myself skated for about fifteen minutes before face-planting halfway down a hill. Most of the folks who saw my left knee afterward asked, “Why weren't you wearing your knee pads?” I was. Friction is a powerful force. Luckily, so are mini cheesecakes. After lunch, I regretted nothing.

Because a lot of our skaters are moms, we had a great deal of derby kids with us yesterday, some well-approaching teenhood and some still learning to toddle. Seeing fellow players with their families is a bit like seeing them off-skate, only more so. One player's son likes to play with derby wheels. Another player can make balloon hats, much to the delight of all of the children and many of the adults. A league is a kind of sweaty, cobbled-together family and events like this remind us that derby leagues are really composed of several families, loaning us their sisters, moms and sons for a few practices a week.

Of course, having children isn't the only defining feature of a family. The league itself is proof of that. I suppose that's why I think social and community-oriented events are so necessary for the health of a league. The kind of bonding derby offers is sudden and intense. It's remarkable how crashing into someone can make you feel like you know them. And you do, in a way. But getting the chance to talk to your fellow players, to meet their friends and partners, to see them out of their knee socks makes the difference between, say, knowing Cthulhu Lemon on the track and knowing Meghan for the rest of the week off-skate.

There are a lot of powerful, hurtful stereotypes about friendships between women. We're often told by entertainment and media advertising told that female friendship is rooted solely in buying shoes together, or in mutual body insecurity or that female friendships whither in the face of the urge to pursue heterosexual bliss. Making friends with other women can be tough. A lot of players I've known have said some variation on, “I've never had many female friends.” When so many of these kinds of women get together, we get surprised by how much we often end up liking each other, even though we're not in a yogurt commercial.

Some players only come to roller derby for the exercise and the physical thrill of playing a fast-paced game. But the majority, I think, end up staying for the family. And the barbecue.