The Paper Ecdysiast

Sisters Doin' It For Each Other: Support in Derby

2012-02-22T11:28:00.000-05:00

And I'm not talking sports bras.

Recently, I outed myself as having some anxiety issues, especially when it comes to derby. The response since from the other players and the honorary sisters among our refs has been wonderful. Because I asked for specific help, namely help with skills training, I've found myself surrounded by potential coaches, all offering their time and support. Players have offered to help during skates at our local rink and even during practices. I've been really overwhelmed by the generosity of the members of our league, who have proven that derby isn't just about pushing yourself to excel. It's also about helping other skaters do their best.

Asking for help can be tough for any skater. Often we're afraid of looking weak, especially in front of such strong, dedicated people as the ones who choose derby. But luckily those same people are so often so generous. Asking for help is tough, but once we do ask, we have a whole league behind us. And with that many kick-ass skaters coming up behind you, you are a force to be reckoned with.

More generally, I've had skaters approach me to offer personal support off the rink. I was worried that the other skaters might be put off or uncomfortable after I explained why I sometimes miss practice or leave early. Because anxiety isn't a visible illness, sometimes it's difficult for people to understand. Of course, I forgot to take into account that I'm not the only anxious player and even those skaters who haven't experienced anxiety are willing to try to understand those who have.

For every skater who has offered support, my faith in derby, in LOCO, and the community we're building here in London has been renewed and made all the stronger for it. All I can say to the amazing LOCO community is that I thank-you for every stride I make on the track. For the significant bruises on my rear, however, I will just thank the floor.

So, with all that the skaters of LOCO have given me, I'm going to try to give back by doing my best, by asking for help when I need it, and when finances permit, buying a round at the bar.

Rollerballin': LOCO's Yearly Good Time Social

2012-02-13T10:02:00.000-05:00

Photo Credit: Jackie 'Bride of Breakin' Spine' Haycock

Roller derby leagues are known for partying. And LOCO, being a rec league, holds this particular derby tradition in especially high regard. But if there's one special party LOCO goes in for, it's our yearly Rollerball. Rollerball is a derby prom, awards show, graduation ceremony and hootenanny all in one: on Saturday night, we filled the Victoria Tavern basement to the rafters with a live rockabilly band, derby girls in their finest (and in some cases their shortest) and a whole lot of red and black decorations.

Why is Rollerball particularly special? I mean, we party with the least incentive. Why the fuss each February? Rollerball is the night we salute our skaters - not only do we give out awards in categories like Best Jammer, Best Booty and Most Competitive, we also point out how every skater has grown over the past year. On Saturday night, I was utterly delighted to see that the planners had written specialized introductions and ordered skate level (absent but forthcoming) dog tags for every skater, not just the rightful winners of Best Dressed and Favourite Mama Hen. Everyone got their moment. Even the refs.

When not dancing with dangerous abandon with my partner and my LOCO lovelies, I watched the crowd and, rather unusually for me, I was just happy to be in the moment - and it was such a lovely moment with my derby family, constituted by these amazing people all brought together by a sport dedicated to strong women supporting each other. My partner and I had both started the evening a bit anxious, but by the time we tottered to the cab home, my faith in my derby community was reconfirmed, renewed in a wash of glitter, sweat, and love between the folks who support their sport and each other.

And that is why Rollerball is a big deal.

Tripping on the Track: Anxiety and Roller Derby -- Part Two

2012-02-09T09:00:00.001-05:00

Last Monday, I asked the question: what is an anxious derby player to do? Obviously I'm no professional, but I can speak from what has and hasn't worked for me.

Totally Off the Track

Deal with the anxiety itself. For some folks, a combination of therapy and medication can do the job. Others prefer to do yoga and eat right. It probably wouldn't hurt to do all four of those things. My point is that if you have anxiety, working with it is a daily process, even on the days you're not exposed to the things that trigger your anxiety. Make sure you're actively engaging with your anxiety off the track and positively reinforcing your efforts because you're doing hard work.

Regarding therapy, if cost is a concern, check to see if your student union, employer or parents have any coverage that can ease the cost. Local hospitals may even have out-patient or group therapy programs that you can participate in at no cost. Check in with your local mental health resources. In my experience, I've had a number of therapists over the last fourteen years of being in and out of counselling and it took a lot of work to find ones that worked for me at the time. Doing goal-oriented cognitive-behavioural therapy has helped me feel more able to intervene when my mood and sense of well-being start to go south. You have a lot of options, however. For Canadian examples, see the Centre for Addiction and Mental Health or the Mental Health Helpline.

Within Your League

First thing's first: be open about your anxiety with your derby family. Don't lie. Being open will take a great deal of the shame and embarrassment out of your anxiety. If that's intimidating, consider telling someone you trust in your league, so you can get their support. Once you share with them, being open with others may seem less scary. Personally, I came out with last Monday's blog post and everyone's been amazing.

Chances are, anyone you tell will do their best to be supportive. But beyond that, letting the anxiety cat out of the bag will better enable your league to help your derby experience by modifying things for your benefit; for example, if you bring it up with your skater rep, there might be an alteration in how practices are structured, if a particular aspect of practice triggers your anxiety. Or if you're feeling behind, ask a fellow skater for extra training. Derby is, at heart, about the skaters. Any league worth its salt will support you.

On Skates

Even if anxiety affects your derby life, you might be fine once you have your quads on. You might not be. Be sure to be open and honest with yourself: don't try to ignore, deny, or rationalize your way out of your feelings. If you're at practice, be at practice - try your best to be present, even if it's difficult. Check in with a derby buddy and when in doubt, take a deep breath and check in with yourself. Ask why you might be reacting a certain way and what the relevant things are that you can and can't change. Above all, practice forgiveness toward yourself.

My Bottom Line

When your anxiety impacts your ability to do an activity you love, it can be unbelievably tough on you. It can be hard to remember that the effort is worth it. But you are worth it. If you are living with anxiety, you are doing something hard and you are being someone brave. You are my hero.

Tripping on the Track: Anxiety and Roller Derby -- Part One

2012-02-06T07:55:00.000-05:00

Like many skaters, my derby life is impacted by a medical issue. Unlike a lot of skaters, however, my issue isn't a bad knee or, say, asthma. I've had anxiety issues on and off since childhood but only started treatment in the last year. At the moment, I'm on medication, seeing a therapist and trying to eat well in order to keep my general health in good condition.

Since starting derby, my anxiety has had varying impacts on my experience of the sport. I started derby before I started my medication and that went as well as could be expected. The effects were clearest if I was even a few minutes late to practice. If the clock read 7:01, I wouldn't be able to get out of the car. I would get upset or bargain with myself, but eventually I would just go home. Even on good days, I would have headaches and nausea during the time before practice (something that goes back to my days of Karate for Kids and my dad accurately predicting I would be fine as soon as I got there). And, as my dad predicted years ago, as soon as I got into the YMCA (or went home), the symptoms went away.

As I started medication, this subsided. I still had pre-practice jitters and still felt socially uncomfortable during practice - to this day, I still have trouble shaking the sensation that I make people uncomfortable - but it was livable. For a while, I was getting to practice fairly often. Then again, for a while, I was on tranquilizers.

More recently, though, I've been having trouble again. Because of my academic work (ostensibly), I haven't been making it to practice at all. I tried again on Friday night. I got a ride and managed to stay at practice for about 30 minutes before I broke, cried, and called my partner to ask for a ride home. It was only as I was taking off my gear that I realized that I had been so anxious previously that I hadn't noticed I had forgotten to put on my elbow pads.

I could identify particular things that made me anxious that night: I felt as if I had lost key skills during my time away, which led me to feel too inexperienced to do regular drills and too "old" a skater to get away with doing basic skills training with the fresh meat; I felt embarrassed for staying away so long; I felt dumb for forgetting one of my knee pads; I felt anxious.

In some ways, it really comes down to that last one. On some days it seems like no matter how perfect conditions might be otherwise, my anxiety ramps up and undoes everything. Perhaps the thing I resent most about anxiety is that it takes away the activities you love. And I do love derby. I love it enough to, unusually for a derby girl, face the prospect of throwing up before practice.

So, what's an anxious derby girl to do? Check back on Thursday for some ideas about keeping your derby worries limited to how impossibly good your shorts look.

Business Review: Roller Derby Shirt Club

2012-02-01T08:00:00.015-05:00

Today, we're reviewing the recently launched Roller Derby Shirt Club.

What Is It?

The Roller Derby Shirt Club is essentially a "Cheese of the Month" Club but with roller derby shirts. You pay for a 6 or 12 month subscription and get a shirt for every month. Each shirt is based on a logo of a different team. Along with the shirt, you get basic info on the team featured and some small miscellaneous derby merch (company stickers and the like).

How Much Does It Cost?

There's a sliding scale based on where you're ordering from. The rundown is as follows, courtesy of the Roller Derby Shirt Club's website:
USA: $75 and up for 6 months, $145 and up for 1 year.
CANADA: $85 and up for 6 months, $165 and up for 1 year.
Everywhere else: $95 for 6 months, $185 for 1 year

That does rightly sound like a significant chunk of change, but the price per shirt is really very reasonable.

What Else Do I Need to Know?

You can update your shirt size and shipping address. They don't seem to do refunds, however, so don't expect that $185 back if you end up not liking the shirts. Leagues and roller derby-related companies can get in touch with them to get involved.

So, Did You Like It?

Yes, but with a few caveats for the potential consumer. Every shirt is sent out at the beginning of the month, so be prepared for a few weeks of waiting if you're a Canadian or International customer. I signed up back in December, so I started with their very first shirt. The shirt arrived, along with an information sheet on the team featured and some stickers and company logo-type stuff that isn't really my bag. The shirt itself featured a cool logo printed on soft cotton. Rather awesomely, RDSC keeps an archive of featured teams and shirts, which I look forward to seeing grow. January was the Rollergirls of the Apocalypse from Germany.

Sizing seems to run a bit small on the shirts, so if you waver between sizes, go for the bigger one. The cotton is nice and soft, but doesn't scream durable, though time will have to tell on that one. RDSC is not for you if you want folks to think you actually got the shirts from the leagues themselves: each shirt features the RDSC logo on the sleeve, so you'll be kept honest.

My initial sizing estimation was off, so I emailed RDSC to change my subsequent shirts to a size up. They got back to me really quickly, so my experience of their customer service so far is very good. I still have a too-tight t-shirt in my closet, but I might either donate it to my league or keep it in case of laundry days or sudden weight loss.

All in all, I'm happy with my purchase and I'm looking forward to having tiny derby care packages coming my way each month, especially since they'll give me a chance to learn about new leagues. Actually, starting next week, for each shirt I get, I'll post about the team featured. So, in terms of inspiration and sweet derby wear, I feel pretty much covered.

Catch Knowledge!: Rollergirl's Spread the Word Contest

2012-01-23T08:00:00.002-05:00

Everyone loves to win stuff. And everyone has an opinion (rather famously, in this way they are like some body parts I usually don't mention in this blog). In Rollergirl's Spread The Word contest, you can win a $100 gift certificate for their site by posting a review of a product you've used on their site and linking to the review on their Facebook page. Entries are limited to one per person and they're working on the honour system, so please do review something you've actually used. The contest closes on February 1st.

I like this contest particularly because Rollergirl is using the gift certificate incentive to add to the body of knowledge on their website. You don't have to praise the product. You don't have to praise their service. You just have to share your opinion on the interwebs ultimately so skaters have a better idea about their potential purchases. Internet purchases can be a huge hassle and your honest opinion might help steer someone in the right direction.

Rollergirl is obviously benefiting from the increased activity on their Facebook page and their product reviews, but there's a clear benefit to the consumer and a focus on the passing-on of knowledge that I think we need to encourage in the culture of derby gear-selling.

So, go tell them what you think. And if you win that $100, consider donating it to your local league to buy loaner gear. That way, you're not just passing on your knowledge, but your good luck. Just saying.

Pack is Here: Getting Friends Into Roller Derby

2012-01-19T17:46:00.000-05:00

Today, I'm going to outline a few possible road-blocks to getting your friends to join you on skates and some advice on how to respond. Keep in mind that I'm not advocating badgering our buddies, but persuading them if they'd love to, but...

1) "Oh, I'm too klutzy. I'll crash into people."

Actually, the second sentence is patently true. Admit that. It's a rare skater that starts off without looking like a newborn deer and one on roller-skates at that. Don't disagree with this one. Just explain that it's not unusual and that derby can help improve one's balance. And that she'll be wearing protective gear and so will everyone else.

2) "I'm not tough enough. Don't you fall?"

There are a couple of directions to go with this one. If you're in a low-contact league, you should stress that the sport features just that - low-contact is less prone to cause injuries that regular full-contact. It's that simple. But tell your friend that falling is a fact of life. And then possibly trip her.

If you're a full-contact player, try giving her a light hip-check (with permission) and ask, "Was that so bad?" Remind her that she'll be in full gear and taught how to handle falls long before she's allowed to play. Leagues want players in good shape and if she's willing to put in the time, she'll be well-prepared. And speaking of time...

3) "Don't you have to skate all the time? I'm way too busy."

This one is a legitimate hurdle. Time is key, especially for full-contact and competitive roller derby. Players who can't put in the time shouldn't play full-contact, competitive derby because they will get injured. However, recreational and low-contact derby can easily accommodate a tougher personal schedule.

Still, ask your friend about rearranging or re-prioritizing her schedule. Playing roller derby can be incredible conditioning for the body and one's social life. We often don't allocate enough time for healthy habits and playing derby can immensely more encouraging than going to the gym.

4) "It's anti-feminist."

I was a bit shocked the first time I heard this one. I'm a pretty strident feminist myself. How could my sport, my women's sport, be anti-feminist? Addressing this concern appropriately can require some complex thinking. A good start is to understand why we hear this concern. Derby is often sold as sexy, featuring babes on skates - just look at a few bout posters and you'll probably see it - and it can be difficult to articulate the difference between sexy and objectifying, to name just one concern.

If you want to have a good dialogue with a friend who has concerns about the sport, ask her to clarify. Then you can disagree.

...Actually, let me correct that. Get personal on this one. Talk about your experiences and what derby has done for you as a woman, working positively with other women. Does your league work with local charities empowering women? Does your team support each other?

Ultimately, derby spreads because we act as ambassadors for the sport. Do us proud.

Gear Maintenance: How to Keep Rolling

2012-01-16T09:00:00.001-05:00

Today, we're going through a quick overview of some resources that can help you keep your skates in good condition.

One great resources is Queen of the Rink's series of How-To videos. Though the videos are intended for fresh meat, they can come in handy for any skater who wants to brush up on specific gear-related skill-sets. Videos include How to Change Your Wheels, How to Adjust Your Trucks, and How to Clean Your Bearings.

Derby Girls Blog has a great Skate and Gear Maintenance Schedule by Veronica Hites. Intended for those skating 3-5 times a week, the schedule can be scaled down for skaters who spend less time on their quads. Divided into sections by the recommended frequency of each activity, the schedule is a great, detailed guide to when you need to take care of what.

Rollergirl has a great guide to skate maintenance including a detailed diagram. A great name in the derby world, Rollergirl operates both an online store and a brick and mortar location in Vancouver, B.C.

Finally, though you need to skate safe, you may also want to skate without getting too smelly. There are two chief ways of keeping your gear clean. The fast way, which is quicker but a hard on your gear, is detailed in this Promise of Derby post on Derby Laundry. The slow way is detailed in the post described above by Rollergirl.

Stitches in Time: The Roller Derby Quilt

2012-01-12T16:07:00.000-05:00

Behold, the Roller Derby Quilt!

This week seems to have inadvertently become Awesome Blog Week, because today we're talking about the Roller Derby Quilt. The brains (and needle and thread) of the operation is Jessica Young, also known as Dreadnought of the Boston Derby Dames' team, the Nutcrackers.

Dreadnought's project is simple but brilliant: send her a quilt square between 5" and 10" with enough seam room that she can sew your square to the roller derby quilt without sewing over your design. Any material goes! Dreadnought suggests showing your name and number if it's a personal square or your logo if the square commemorates your team or league. It's that simple. Just email her at rollerderbyquilt (at) gmail (dot) com to get the address to mail your square to. In the mean time, check out the project on Twitter.

Though Dreadnought doesn't address this on her blog and it may not be part of her intention at all, the quilt recalls a number of amazing community textile pieces, including the simply astounding NAMES Project AIDS Memorial Quilt, which memorializes lives lost to AIDS in what is apparently the biggest piece of folk art in the world. Whether Dreadnought was inspired by that quilt or not, the Roller Derby Quilt is a great idea for a number of reasons.

Female artists have used textiles to amazing effect, such as Judy Chicago's The Dinner Party. Quilting, as a stereotypically feminine practice gets reclaimed as a collaborative art medium in projects like the Roller Derby Quilt. And happily for those who want to contribute to the ongoing history of derby culture, being a part of this project isn't necessarily expensive or time consuming. You (or a talented team-mate) just need to get out your sewing needle and get creative.

Another Day, Another Dame: Roller Derby Girl of the Day

2012-01-09T07:00:00.010-05:00

Recently, the blog Roller Derby Girl of the Day was drawn to my attention. Still fairly new, the blog features individual roller derby girls, nominated either by themselves or friends, from around the world. Written by Hijinx of the Rollergettes in Toronto, Canada, the blog draws attention to the faces of derby and not just the ones that grace WFTDA's top teams, lovely though those faces are. The blog, wonderfully, aims to feature women who inspire you, for any derby reason. Whether they got you into the sport or they are your secret derby crush, the women featured on this blog are there because they make a difference in the world of derby.

There are a few key reasons that a blog like this is important. We can all benefit from role models. And it's crucial to remember that role models don't just skate the hardest or block with the most elegance and force. Though the blog already features immensely talented players, it's about more than athletic ability. Hijinx's request for nominees called out derby shop owners, bloggers, and any woman who inspires her fellow players to work toward being their best and to get all they can out of this amazing sport. This blog works much the same way that derby does, but on a bigger scale, using the internet rather than sweaty osmosis (inspiration is soluble, you see). There is so much power in the inspiration players give each other and because of blogging efforts like this one, that inspiration can go so far beyond the bench, beyond the rink and all over the world.

Frankly, I wish I'd thought of it myself.

So, my challenge to you is this - nominate someone. Flood this awesome blogger's inbox with a bevy of amazing women, because they are the lifeblood of our sport. When we remind ourselves exactly how someone inspires us, they buoy us up all over again. Do yourself a favour and take the time to be inspired. You are surrounded by sources of strength. Share them.

Some of my heroes - the LOCO VPs, plus our capital P Vansterdamn, who is rather delightfully the very first Roller Derby Girl of the Day

Slow Derby Rocks: Blood on the Flat Track Review

2012-01-05T09:16:00.002-05:00

Often you'll hear the slogan, "Slow derby sucks." I'm not especially attached to the idea, especially given how exciting strategies and positional blocking sometimes necessitate slower play. And if you do agree with the above, Blood on the Flat Track: The Rise of the Rat City Rollergirls may not be for you.

A 2007 documentary on Rat City, Seattle's premier roller derby league, Blood on the Flat Track is a thoughtful, relatively slow-paced film. It takes the time to depict in-depth stories about intra-league romances, interviews regarding how the teams feel about each other, and how the league came into its own. It's a wonderfully detailed film, but it doesn't have an over-arching narrative that some viewers might need to maintain their interest. When I saw it for the first time at a derby buddy's house, we ended up turning it off and watching Arrested Development instead.

But after returning to the film, I really enjoyed it. The detail and intimacy of the stories presented are incredibly charming if you take the time to let them sink in. You really go home with these players: you learn how they got married, you learn how they got into the sport, you learn about a family derby dynasty. My particular favourite was seeing how the teams interact on and off the track. Also, the Derby Liberation Front is my new favourite team.

If you're looking for a plot-driven derby doc, check out Hell on Wheels (reviewed by me here). But if you want to get cozy with a great league and get to know its players, Blood on the Flat Track is for you. It's also a wonderfully inclusive and super queer film.

One of the most interesting aspects of the film is how it catches Rat City at a pivotal moment, when derby in the city was still more in touch with its theatrical roots - we see out and out brawling and creative penalties that you just don't see in today's derby. It's remarkable seeing how fast the sport has professionalized and Blood on the Flat Track nicely catches the tipping point.

In that sense, it might be a good idea idea, if you're doing a derby double-feature, to watch Hell on Wheels first and Blood on the Flat-Track second. Together, they chart a great deal of the sport's progress.

The bottom line here is that Blood on the Flat Track is a detailed, emotionally engaging look into a healthy league. Folks looking for derby action will find it and those in need of a plot will find an arc later in the film regarding Rat City playing against the big girls of derby. Watch it with your league and I think you'll find yourselves seeing some familiar stories and I mean that in the best way possible.

Four skates out of five.

Rolling in the New Year: Derby Resolutions

2012-01-02T10:32:00.000-05:00

Now that everyone's had a chance to sober up from New Year's Eve, let's consider our resolutions for the New Year. Roller derby is a sport that demands improvement and no doubt a number of glasses were raised on Saturday night along with promises to skate harder and better this year.

But let's consider how to make smarter derby resolutions. "This year, I am going to skate like Suzy Hotrod" is certainly ambitious, but it's got a couple of serious problems. Let me break down the elements of a good roller derby resolution.

1) Specificity: Make your terms clear to yourself. Instead of saying, "I will skate more often," choose a specific number. Instead of saying, "I will learn how to do a tomahawk stop," say, "I will learn how to do a tomahawk stop by talking to (insert skater here)." Keep it specific and you'll have clearer steps toward achieving your goal.

2) Attainability: We would all like to jam like LuluDemon. But for some of us, there will be a number of intermediate steps until we get there. With that said, you have a year to make good on a promise to yourself: balance ambition with attainability if you want to stay excited about while keeping it realistic. The more ambitious your goal, the more you should break it down into attainable, specific steps.

3) Community: Derby is a team sport. Tell your team-mates about your resolution. Ask them if they've made any. Share public commitments to your goals and you'll feel more invested in making them happen. Consider trading resolutions with your derby wife - she'll ask you about yours and you'll return the favour. Blog about it. Put it on Facebook as a status update: "I will break my record by (number of laps) in time trials".

4) Body Positivity: Make sure it's a goal that will really benefit your game. Is the resolution about your skills and health or is it about your pride, or, unhealthy body images? Weight loss is not necessarily a healthy or realistic resolution: if you are feeling pressure to lose weight, talk it over with your doctor and discuss it with body-positive friends.

5) Self-Worth: The road to a goal often has bumps - the errant toe-stop in the flat-track of life - and be ready to forgive yourself for any back-sliding and keep going. It's easy to lose heart, especially if we haven't done as well as we hoped we would. But take the hit and get back up on your skates.

Happy New Year, all. Celebrate and go skate. For the record, my resolutions are 1) to skate at least twice a week, even during my crunch time, 2) to learn how to transition more effectively and 3) to not give a damn whether other people think I look good in those shorts I bought at World Cup.

Post-Holiday Haul: Gifts and Roller Derby

2011-12-29T10:18:00.000-05:00

After a long period of holiday radio silence, we're back to our regular blogging schedule. Sorry for the long delay! I was taking care of two golden retrievers and finishing essays, both of which I'm still doing, but doing so after December 25th makes a big difference.

Today, I'm getting a little personal - my family celebrates Christmas and being an underfunded student (as if there's any other kind) I asked for a few pieces of derby wear. My father and brother ended up going to Rollerbug in Toronto. A mainstay of the Toronto derby scene, Rollerbug operates in the same space as Cardinal Skateshop. Despite being ravaged by holiday shoppers, the store staff helped them pick out two gifts.

In my family, we have a habit of putting clues on our Christmas presents. This first derby gift said "Round and round she goes, where she stops the rainbow knows." The gift? Rollerbones rainbow booty shorts. An American company, Rollerbones sells wheels, apparel and other accessories. They were at the World Cup this year and were very personable.

Mine's the rainbow.

My second gift was labeled "Wear protection" and inside was the gift I wanted most this year - Smith Scabs knee pads. No more masking taped up pads for me. These white-capped knee pads won't mark the floor where we practice and green is my colour. They fit well and I'm really excited to try them out and use my old pads as my outdoor spares. Look for a product review once I've put them through their paces.

Now, more generally, birthdays and gift-giving holidays can be a great time to nudge your friends, family and partners (if they're gift-givers) into focusing their attentions on the roller derby side of things when it comes to selecting your present. The folks who like us (or have us as their Secret Santa recipient at work) often do want to get us things we'll like and we need to be clear if we want to make their shopping easier. Getting smaller derby-related gifts can help you stay under budget yourself and avoid gifts you'll never use.

And not every derby gift is an expensive as a new pair of skates. Remind folks who are looking for gift ideas for you (at any time of the year) that, for example, a Protech Mouth Guard only costs $25 Canadian. Depending on your needs, wheels, bearings, maintenance gear and skating apparel can all make great gifts without breaking the bank. And gift cards to sites like Rollergirl can add up or save you that extra $10 when you might need it. And chances are that you will.

This Monday, look for a special post on New Years resolutions and roller derby.

Beaver Fever: An Open Letter to Team Canada

2011-12-08T09:29:00.001-05:00

Dear Team Canada,

At last weekend's World Cup, you won. Not second place, but the whole damn thing. You showed derby teams from across the globe what heart, swagger and dedication mean. You sang and danced (wonderfully, I might add). You played great derby. And yes, you came in second, but you scored more points against Team USA than all of their other competitors combined.

But here's what else you did. You inspired derby girls - ones flying in to support their national teams who couldn't help but cheer for you in the final, ones who took the bus to Toronto and slept on a friend's floor to see you play, ones who came home ready to work that much harder because of the example you gave them. You scored a 40-point jam against the fabulous Team England. You wore hockey helmets. You broke your clavicle. You made us yell your names, just by being as amazing as you are.

When I think of the World Cup, here's what I remember: LuluDemon's grace and speed on the track, Windigo's awesome blocking, SmackDaddy's ability to play any goddamn position, Killson's ability to get the crowd going - every player from Team Canada pulled the weight of a nation behind them and they did it with incredible strength and spirit.

Being at the World Cup was a chance to watch the greatest roller derby players in the world, and that's you, all of you.

Thank-you. Thank-you. Thank-you.

Your fan,
Cthulhu Lemon

Cthulhu Lemon's Guide to the Roller Derby World Cup

2011-12-01T12:44:00.000-05:00

Today is the first day of the Roller Derby World Cup with Canada and France facing off at 5 pm. For those you not in need of my previous post on watching the World Cup without a ticket - volunteers get in free, remember - this is a short guide to taking on the World Cup without getting lost or passing out on the TTC.

Preparation: Getting Your Wheels Up

1) Check to ensure you have the essentials: tickets, cash for buying merch and food, blankets if you're planning on hitting the bleachers and collapsible chairs if you're in for suicide seating.
2) Get some rest ahead of time! This is going to be very busy.

Map of Downsview Park

3) Check your maps. If you're not used to getting to The Bunker, check out instructions at the Downsview Park website. Alternately, take advantage of the WCRD Bus! It's $10 for service all through the World Cup and you might bump into your favourite skater from Team Finland. Further details are at the link!
4) Research any special options you need. Are you vegan? Do you or a friend need accessible seating? Plan ahead and then it's smooth skating from there.
5) Prioritize. Are you there to watch Team Ireland? Are you collecting team merch? Or do you really want to focus on the finals? Make sure you plan for when you may have to choose between two amazing things.
6) Exchange contact info with league-mates and friends you hope to meet up with. "Meet me at the door" will not work.

On Bout Day(s), or, Hold on to your Helmet Panties!

1) Get up and to the venue early! Account for travel time and crowd-navigating time.
2) Support the teams and organizers by buying merch, if you can afford it. Don't make them fly back to Australia with t-shirts in tow.
3) Take photos. Make your Facebook friends jealous.
4) Meet other fans and players. Hit up the after-parties. One cannot live on derby alone. Make some new friends you can trade training secrets with.
5) Don't try to do everything. Burnout can wreck your weekend. Take breaks and give yourself time to rest.

After the Shenanigans

1) Thank whoever let you sleep on their floor.
2) Sport that sweet merch you bought.
3) Start planning for next year.

No Ticket: Ways to See the Roller Derby World Cup

2011-11-28T10:29:00.001-05:00

Just for the record, the following suggestions do not include sneaking in a bathroom window.

For those derby fans who do not have tickets to the 1st Roller Derby World Cup but still want to see some derby action on the day, here are a few suggestions.

1) Scavenge! Tickets are still available for Thursday and Friday through the ticket sales site and the official Roller Derby World Cup site has a waiting list in operation in case tickets get cancelled. For those who want to get on the waiting list for Saturday tickets and weekend passes, email worldcupwaitinglist@gmail.com with your name and the days you want to attend. Folks will be notified according to their position on the list if tickets become available.

Also, you could consider checking Kijiji, but this option is not recommended. Go through the official channels and you have your best chance of getting in.

2) Volunteer! Your reward for helping the World Cup happen is getting to watch it. Click here to download volunteer instructions in Word format. You'll get to work with amazing roller derby players from all over the world in exchange for a few hours of your time.

3) Watch it on the Derby News Network! For those of us who can't make it to the venue, DNN is a lifesaver. Free broadcasting with commentary is nothing to sneeze at. Consider donating to DNN to keep it running if you watch - you're saving $37 per day, after all.

However you get there - be it in person or through an internet connection - you'll be a part of derby history. Enjoy the hits and the heart and remember that there is still time to donate to the teams!

Also, as a side-note. Team New Zealand has hereby claimed the status of hottest, butchest team via my Comments section. I look forward to seeing the proof!

Elle Grande LOCO Tournament: A Family Affair

2011-11-24T10:34:00.001-05:00

MID-JAM EXCITEMENT: Photo Credit Heather Manners

This past weekend, LOCO's four chapters came together to do something unique in the history of the franchise. Players from London, Kitchener,. Stratford and Brantford were sorted into three teams, the Hot Chihuahuas, the Chupacabras and the Stuffed Pinatas and played for our own golden boot.

Adrienne Balboa's hot pants
ask a crucial question
Photo credit: Natalie Buragina

Part of what was so brilliant about this event was the mixing of players - women who have briefly seen each other at practices got to depend on each other on the track and that's a pretty difficult bonding experience to top. It also meant that one city with a bigger pool of players didn't get a stacked deck of experienced derby girls. Every team had a chance of winning this tournament. LOCO put into practice what it preaches: equal derby opportunity for all.

Though I missed it because I was sick, I'm fascinated by what an event like this means for a family like LOCO. What started off just over two years ago has grown to include four healthy chapters in four cities and it's still growing. Alumni who have since moved on to contact leagues returned to play with the people who taught them to skate. It very literally brought all sorts of women together this weekend to play low-contact derby without sacrificing any of what makes roller derby amazing. This is what low-contact, high-strategy roller derby looks like. It's fun to play and fun to watch and it isn't going away.

It's natural that as roller derby spreads, it's going to change, it's going to grow amazing off-shoots like Derby Lite and LOCO. These variations are extensions and wonderful complications of what roller derby can mean. At its heart, it's the love of the game, the screech of quad skates on a sharp stop, the amazing community. But beyond that, it can be about anything the players - those beautiful, strong, committed players - want it to be.

I'm so, so proud of the players, refs and volunteers associated with the extended LOCO family. They have added a unique chapter to the history of the franchise and they did it while being watched by family and friends. They are passionate and generous and fuck, can some of these people skate.

The LOCO Rainbow: Photo credit Heather Manners

Research on Wheels: Not Just for Sexy Derby Librarians

2011-11-21T08:00:00.003-05:00

From the DC Rollergirls

Recently, I received a really useful comment on a post. I had used a logo from the DC Rollergirls in the course of a discussion on highly feminized derby imagery. A former player from the league rightly pointed out that the logo wasn't necessarily the limit of the league's gender representation. And she was totally right.

Blogging about derby well requires going beyond Google. Though searching for 'roller derby' and shifting through image results is a good start for getting a sense of what's out there, it doesn't allow you as a blogger (or a derby fan) the chance to really get to know a league - its history, its personality, its players. Leagues almost always have web-based sources for information, ranging from Facebook pages, to forums, to Tumblrs, to extensive league websites. Players often blog themselves. Local newspapers may have featured them as well. There's a lot to see for those who care to look, I've learned.

Since that comment, I've tried to focus on getting to know the teams I've mentioned here. So, with much admiration, I'd like to introduce you to the DC Rollergirls. Formed in 2006, the league is Washington, DC's only all-female flat-track league. They are members of WFTDA, to boot. They have three home teams - the Cherry Blossom Bombshells, the DC Demon Cats and Scare Force One. They also have a travel-team, the DC All-Stars. They also have the Majority Whips, though that team doesn't have an assigned page at the moment. They also have a really impressive number of refs - the most I've seen listed for a league their size.

A non-profit league, the DC Rollergirls have been featured in the Washington Examiner and works with charitable causes like Bread for the City. They are currently ranked 11th in WTFDA's East division, between Maine Roller Derby and Suburbia Roller Derby out of Westchester County, New York. 11th place is no slouch when your division includes teams like Gotham Girls, Montreal, and Charm City.

So, if you're in Washington, check out these ladies. They're capital.

Going Butch: Roller Derby World Cup Edition -- Part Four

2011-11-19T08:00:00.004-05:00

At long last, this is the final post in our four-part series on roller derby and butch identity. Today, we're showcasing rad butch and otherwise awesome women coming to represent their countries in the first Roller Derby World Cup. As mentioned previously, these players may not necessarily identify as butch. But they do look great. If anyone wants to be taken down, let me know!

After looking at the first alphabetical half of the contenders on Thursday, today, we're starting with France.

From Team France's site

Team France: Even though Team France does not yet have all of its team members extensively profiled, this was still a hard decision. But #HK13, Truck Off Pooky is my choice from this team. Team France showed a great sense of humour, skewering French stereotypes through its team photos. Truck Off Pooky, aside from rocking a sweet hat and mustache in her promo shot, has a great cropped hairstyle and a distinctive tattoo arm sleeve. Truck Off Pooky multi-tasks as a jammer, blocker and pivot for the Paris Roller Girls.

From Team Germany's site

Team Germany: This team was another tough choice. Looking tough, talented and frankly splendidly attractive, this is a hell of a team. My choice from the German team is #66 BamBule. With tattoos, gorgeous piercings, dramatic hair and glasses, BamBule is coming for Toronto. Details on this skater are a bit hard to come by, despite GoogleTranslate's best efforts. BamBule plays for Bear City Roller Derby in Berlin and if I see her in person at the World Cup, I might actually pass out.

From Team Ireland's FB page

Team Ireland: #1000 Canadian Psycho is my choice from the team coming from my mother's hereditary homeland. It's not just because she's Canadian and it's not just because she's holding an axe. Skating for GTAR in Toronto, Canada, Canadian Psycho is one of the Derby Debutantes. She is clearly hotter than Christian Bale and rocks a short hair-cut and a blood spatter far better as well. We'll see her in Toronto!

From New Zealand's FB page

Team New Zealand: New Zealand's Facebook page and Tumblr do not yet currently have pics of individual players, so here's a shot of their sweet logo. It's not exactly butch, but it is awesome. If anyone can point me towards pictures of players, let me know! I'll keep an eye on Team New Zealand's sites just in case!

From Team Scotland's FB Page

Team Scotland: I have a soft spot for Scotland. And even if I didn't, it would still be a great-looking team. My pick from this fine bunch is #42 Alma Geddon, who is rocking the short hair in her promo pic. Alma Geddon skates for the Auld Reekie Rollergirls, both on the home-team Leithal Weapons and the all-star travel team, Twisted Thistles in Edinburgh.

Team Sweden: My room-mate joked that, of course, all of the Swedish players would be attractive. Naturally, she was right. But I picked Swede Hurt, who has played all over the U.S., including a final stint for Gotham Girls before heading to her current spot playing for Crime City Rollers in Malmö. Swede Hurt is the head coach for Team Sweden and gets my choice because of the sheer amount of swagger in her promo shot.

Team USA: Let's be frank - coming from a country with so many amazing roller derby teams, Team USA is a powerhouse. And they look good. My pick from this team is #90 mph Little A from the Tampa Bay Derby Darlin's. Sporting a great cropped 'do and some piercings, Little A plays for both the Black Widows and the all-star travel team, the Tampa Tantrums, of which she is co-captain. Though you can't see it here, she has a totally sweet arm tattoo.

Finally, the absolutely hottest people involved in the World Cup in December are the people who sponsor teams. These players cannot shoulder the financial burden of making it to the World Cup without you. Tomorrow, I am going to randomly select a team to donate money to, because they all need it. Again, this is the Blood and Thunder hub for all of the teams' donation and merch pages. Use it!

Well, that's all the creeping I'm doing today. Check back on Monday for a special on the DC Rollergirls and why when blogging about roller derby, you need to do your research!

Going Butch: Roller Derby World Cup Edition -- Part Three

2011-11-17T09:52:00.002-05:00

Today's entry is our third installment in what ended up being a four-part series about butch identity and roller derby. I'm going to pick out players from World Cup teams who, in their promo material, look rather dapper. These women may not necessarily identify as butch, but fans who appreciate short hair, tattoos, and badass women will know who to cheer for at the World Cup this December. Today, I'll pick out players from half of the World Cup teams. Look for the second half on Saturday. We'll return to our regular posting on Monday with a feature on the DC Rollergirls.

If any players would prefer to be taken off my list, let me know! Extra special thanks to the team pages, Blood and Thunder and the Derby News Network for empowering my creeping!

From Team Argentina's Facebook page

Team Argentina: Let's be frank: Argentina is a glamorous team. Therefore my pick from them is based pretty much on sweet tattoos. #9 White Rabbit has awesome ink, featuring Jessica Rabbit and Betty Boop. She may be a long-haired bunny (not unlike an angora), but any derby fan would be happy to fawn over her tats.

From the CARD site

Team Australia: My pick from this fabulous team is #58 Dodge 'n Bolt. Her sweet haircut and great smile are enough to catch the heart and mind of any rollerfan. Coming from Coastal Assassins Roller Derby along the Sunshine Coast of Australia, she's playing for the national team come December.

From the Team Brasil site

Team Brasil: Brasil featured several awesome short-haired players, but I have to give my pick to #7 Lobster from the Capital City Derby Dolls in Ottawa. Though she plays in Canada, her heart is clearly in Brasil. And who could refuse that grr-face? So long as pinching isn't a major penalty, she should do great this year.

From the Montreal Roller Derby site

Team Canada: Oh, Canada. So many rad butch options on my nation's team. However, there can only be one, so my pick is #3X Smack Daddy from Montreal Roller Derby. Smack plays on Montreal's travel team, New Skids on the Block and wears a mustache with panache. Watch out for the paddle.

From Team England's site

Team England: Wow. This team's roster looks amazing and made my choice pretty darn difficult. My pick for England is #16 Violet Attack from the Birmingham Blitz Dames. Within the league, she plays for the Sirens. Her mohawk alone could be enough to make a fan switch patriotic allegiance. (Sorry, Canada!)

From Team Finaland's site

Team Finland: Finland has the best hair in roller derby. You heard it here first. Picking one player was a wrench, but #54 The Blizzard was my final choice, because you gotta have blue hair. Currently living in England, The Blizzard plays for Bristol Roller Derby, of which she is a founding member.

Ultimately, if you want to see these ladies in December, donate to their teams. Almost every World Cup team has a Paypal account or a similarly easy way of donating set up for your use (just click on the team names above to get to their sites!). As I've said before, getting to the World Cup is not cheap. These players deserve your support. After all it's no good waiting to see sweet derby action if the team couldn't pay for flights. Skip on your latte today and put that fiver to the team of your choice. Click here for Blood and Thunder's list of fundraising and merch pages!

Check back on Saturday for the second half of my feature on World Cup players. New Zealand, I'm coming for you!

Going Butch: Keeping Roller Derby Dapper -- Part Two

2011-11-14T08:00:00.002-05:00

Last week, I posted about how leagues can make themselves more welcoming to butch players. Today, I'll make some suggestions for keeping your fine butch self styling on the track. Also, I've included pictures of cute girls.

Notes: pics have mostly been taken from DapperQ, which is a fabulous site.

Clothing

Clothes do not make the butch - confidence and swagger do, but clothes can certainly help. Keeping in mind that you're probably wearing a team uniform, you can still keep yourself dapper. If your team uniform includes both top and bottom - unlike, say, a team shirt with whatever you like south of your navel - try to look for more masculine cuts. If your team wears red hot-pants, see if you can find red shorts. If your team wears tank tops, consider switching it for a vest or a collared shirt, or wearing a collared shirt underneath a team shirt. So long as you match the colour and the font of your name and number, you'll still fit in with your team and maintain your identity on the track.

If so long as you wear the team shirt, you can wear what pants you like, consider longer shorts. With these, cut, collar, and pattern can really bring out your dandy side. Consider pin-stripes or pairing them with suspenders in your team colours. So long as your name and number are visible, you're golden

From DapperQ

Accessories

Personally, my favourite butch accessory is the tie. You'll want to depend on your own common sense and perhaps check in with your health and safety committee to see whether you can incorporate a neck-tie into your boutfit. Alternately, consider tucking the tie into your team shirt or the bowtie. Geeky yet classy, the bowtie signals butch confidence and a sense of humour without leaving any material dangling to get caught on something during a jam. Tips for tying a bowtie are here!

If there's any room in your shorts for back pockets, consider a well-tucked hanky. You'll want to keep it from falling on the track and getting under someone's wheels, however. Consider taping that sucker in. You'll also want to consider the hanky code, lest you give another player the wrong idea.

From DapperQ

Wrist cuffs! Bring attention to your hot fore-arms with cuffs and bracelets pushed up past your wrist guards. You'll want to be sure you don't mind getting them banged up - unless you like your leather cuffs thoroughly worn, keep them at home.

Derby Names

If you haven't already chosen your name, consider how a derby name can reinforce your butch identity. Not every player has to be a Beyonslay (though that is a damn fine name). Consider butch celebrities you can honour with your name. At the time of this post being written, k.d. fang isn't taken. Rachel MadCow, WandaSykesYouOut, Amy RayGun, Jenny ShimmiesYou, and Alison Wreckdel are all free, too. You saw them here first.

Ultimately, butch identity is a beautiful, powerful thing. Derby deserves more of it and the butch women who love derby deserve to feel able to represent themselves. It's amazing what a tie can do for a girl or a boi.

Coming up next Thursday: a post about cute derby players looking dapper, so you know which teams to throw your helmet panties at once the World Cup starts.

From DapperQ, Photo Credit: DJ Vito Fun

Going Butch: Roller Derby for the Happily Non-femme -- Part One

2011-11-10T09:51:00.000-05:00

DC Rollergirls Logo

Generally, roller derby features a hyper-femininity without the passivity that society often associates with being feminine. Instead, derby girls are commonly pictured as stereotypically sexy and feminine in addition to being born ass-kickers. There are fishnets and booty shorts to go with that black-eye, we assure potential buyers of tickets to bouts.

Of course, there is an argument to be made that the kind of aggression that derby is often marketed to have doesn't, in fact, break through gender stereotypes, but retreads how we conceive of female aggression, namely in terms of the cat-fight. That isn't actually my main point today, but the problems presented by the popular conception of derby as ultra-femme aggression affect something close to my heart, specifically that it can create an environment unwelcoming to butch women.

I'm writing this post today partially in response to the fact that my blog stats page informed me that someone Googled "roller derby butch" and ended up on my blog. I searched it myself to see what was out there. To be clear: there aren't a whole lot of relevant results for that search, in part because derby is not often marketed as being friendly to butch women.

How then, can leagues work on ensuring that women who don't go in for knee socks can still feel welcome in their local derby league? I have three suggestions.

If you have the credit info for this, let me know!

1) Stop relying on the pin-up. Derby's love affair with the retro fun of pin-up photography is fun, but it's not all we are. As a league, as a producer of posters, bout guides, team logos, websites, etc, try harder to depict derby in more diverse ways - there are so many different ways of being a woman and cuban heel stockings don't define all of them. Our imagery tells prospective players whether or not they are likely to be welcome in our league. Is your marketing welcoming to butch women?

2) Explore what falls outside stereotypical femininity. This is not to say that we have to give up being femme on the track. Hot pants are fun and I enjoy when my team-mates rock them. But you don't need to be wearing glitter make-up to skate in a jam. Support your fellow players who don't go for stereotypically feminine wear. What's empowering for you might be stifling for them. As a team-member, consider how your team's uniforms, logo, and brand may be saying, "No bois allowed".

3) Market directly to butch women. Derby and diversity can go hand in hand - the excitement of derby league involvement in Pride Parades is proof of that. In Toronto, we even have the yearly Clam Slam - an all-queer derby extravaganza. This is not to say that a queer woman is necessarily a butch woman or vice versa. But putting up a poster indicating that you accept *all* women in your league in spaces that support butch women (such as your local queer bar or a meeting space for folks who don't go in for gender normativity) is a good step toward making your league more friendly to butch players and ultimately stronger for that diversity.

By the amazing Cristy C. Road for Bitch Magazine, 2005

On Monday, look for Part Two of this post, a more in-depth discussion of suggestions for butch players who still want action on the track while being themselves. There should also be a Part Three featuring amazing butch players and role models in Canada and farther afield who I may or may not have crushes on.

Wheeling in Winter: The Roller Derby Off-Season

2011-11-07T08:24:00.000-05:00

With November well underway, it's a time that derby starts to go dormant for the year in some countries. With WFTDA Championships coming up next week, derby girls are having their last hurrahs until spring. Season-ender parties and final bouts are popping up and would-be fresh meat in bigger cities are likely being told to wait for next spring's training camp.The Winter season, at least in Canada, is time for derby folks to practice, cross-train and have visions of spring bouts dance in their heads.

But keeping motivated is essential. For players who find being without bouts to look forward to hard on their derby dedication, the gym and skate nights at the local roller rink are not your only option.

Many recreational leagues don't have down-time: experienced players can volunteer their time as trainers and new skaters can always learn something - rec leagues often feature very experienced skaters who, due to injury, availability, or preference, have decided to skate recreationally. Low-contact leagues also emphasize strategy and positional blocking, since checking is out of the equation: it's a useful way of thinking about the game we love and it will improve your performance come spring. Refs are always needed, of course, and many rec leagues play and practice all year. Consider learning something new from your derby sisters on the other side of the rink. Volunteering your time (and likely being bought a drink afterwards) is something you can look forward to.

But what are your other options? Outdoor skating on ice is a kind of cross-training that will keep you engaged (and frequently features hot chocolate), but wearing your knee pads is essential unless you fancy limping away from the rink as I did last year. Depending on your snow-fall, outdoor skating on your quads is a possibility, but it's important to remember that drivers may have less control on the road, again depending on the weather conditions in your area. Additionally, drivers may not be expecting skaters on the road - keep it on the bike paths.

Be sure to keep in contact with your fellow league-members. Other derby players will keep you excited as the days get shorter. Chances are that you came to the game for the challenge and the company: keep both part of your winter derby experience and you'll be ready for spring.

The Accidental Athlete: Fitness and Roller Derby

2011-10-27T09:33:00.000-04:00

Let me begin by saying that I am not the most dedicated derby girl. Sometimes I miss practice and sometimes when it's go all out or not throw up, I opt for the latter. There are derby girls who are incredibly fit, whose bodies are well-oiled and fishnet-covered machines. I am not one of those women.

Yet last night, I went jogging with my room-mate for the first time in about three years. And while I didn't keep up perfectly, I kept up a whole lot better than I did last time. My room-mate, a military reservist, is kind of my hero when it comes to fitness: she has amazing drive and her ability to maintain a commitment just blows me away. I couldn't help but note that while I'm about twenty pounds heavier than I was during that last run, I have better lung capacity and endurance, and, dare I say it, I'm more fit.

Typically, when I call myself fit, I mean that I fit into about half of my wardrobe at any given time. But the last time I zipped up my Docs, I had to loosen the laces to let the boots fit my calves. Despite my inconstant heart, derby is having an effect on my body - not just on my confidence and my social life.

And my ability to earn my level-three skills bearing necklace!
Photo credit Rosemary Van Gelderen

In some ways, I feel like this happened accidentally: I've never really felt like I've improved in terms of my fitness level in derby, perhaps because what I tend to focus on is more my skill testing. But it happened anyway. It turns out that I'm proof that anything - anything - is better than just sitting on your bum. When I was focused on other things, say, my cross-overs, I was getting fitter without realizing it.

Vansterdamn teaching me. She's awesome.
Photo Credit: Natalie 'Vegas' Buragina

And this is why roller derby is better for you than stair-climbing, in my estimation. The sport has so many potential payoffs - the challenge, the friendships, the confidence-building, and as I've found out, the slow but steady progress of one's fitness level.

Roller derby tricked me into being more fit. And I couldn't be happier about it.

Portrait of a City on Skates: Roller Derby in London, Ontario

2011-10-24T08:00:00.019-04:00

I didn't skate until I moved back to London. Since getting here, I've been really impressed by the derby community and what a determined skater can get out of the city. I'll be profiling London, Ontario based on a few key areas. If you're considering relocating to London and want to keep derby friendliness in mind, consider the following points.

Chances to Play?

London itself is home to both low-contact, recreational roller derby and full-contact derby. LOCO Roller Derby, my home league started in London but has since spread to Stratford, Brantford, and Kitchener. Also within the city, you can find the Forest City Derby Girls, a robust local full-contact league featuring the star Thames Fatales and the Luscious Lunch Ladies, their newest team. Just under an hour's drive can take you to Woodstock, Ontario, where you can find the Woodstock Warriors, another new full-contact team.

Chances to Watch Bouts?

The only public bouting currently available is through FCDG. They bout at the Western Fairgrounds. Tickets are usually $12 - $15 and the show is well worth it. Both LOCO and the Woodstock Warriors put on public events, both on and off-skate, often in the form of fundraisers for the leagues or local charities.

Where to Purchase Equipment?

London's listings on Kijiji are always worth a look if you're in the market for used wheels and skates. The Board Shop is usually worth checking out for protective gear and Shock Doctor Mouthguards are available at any of the city's Source for Sports. The only local consistent source for skates, wheels and other equipment is Rollersk8s R Us, which offers a fresh meat package, used and new skates, and 10% off for derby players.

For those willing to leave the city, Hamilton's Rough House is one option. Rollerbug and My Roll Life (opening soon) in Toronto are two derby-owned shops worth checking out as well.

Members of the leagues around London are often willing to split shipping from online stores like Rollergirl, which has highly competitive prices and selection in addition to being derby-owned.

Where Can I Practice?

During the months outdoor skating is possible, London's park systems are very skate-friendly. Connected by bike paths, they offer routes with a variety of difficulty levels, often within a stone's throw of the Thames River. These routes can be busy, so consider skating during off-peak hours and skate with a buddy whenever possible. Here's a PDF of the parks!

The North London Optimist Community Centre is the most popular indoor skating option in in the city. They offer adult skates on Wednesday night starting at eight p.m. Family skates occur from one to four on Saturdays and Sundays. Be forewarned that Wednesday nights are often very busy and are not usually recommended for beginners. Weekend skates are much more relaxed at NLOCC.

Additionally, all of the leagues listed previously host open practices. Depending on their home rules, your first skate might even be free.

Roller Derby World Cup: The United Nations of Ass-Kicking

2011-10-20T10:21:00.000-04:00

This year, from December second to the fourth, the worldwide roller derby community gets something new to injure itself during. The Roller Derby World Cup, held in Toronto, Ontario, Canada is the first of its kind and it is a sign that roller derby is still growing. It's a very exciting time to be on skates. Derby players from thirteen countries will play for the very first world championship. There will be signs in several languages. Fans from New Zealand will spill beer on fans from Germany. The after-parties may end in bloodshed and the initiations of long-distance love affairs.

Let me be clear: I am deeply excited for the World Cup. I have my ticket and my spot on a friend's floor, if I happen to sleep while I'm there. But the World Cup does remind us about specific barriers that exist in derby.

Financially, teams need to be able to pony up or raise funds for travel, food and accommodations. Individual players need to be able to take and able to afford potential time off work, in addition to the fact that the burden of paying for the team's costs will probably land most heavily on them. Anyone in a league knows players will toss in their own money when the team needs it, sometimes even when that's not a great financial decision. (For folks interested in supporting their teams, check this list of links to teams' web sites and chances to donate.) Derby is an expensive sport and as I've discussed before, it's up to us as a community to try to ease that burden on players.

More generally, while having players from thirteen countries is very, very exciting, that's thirteen out of about one hundred and ninety seven, if the internet doesn't lie to me. This isn't to say that I expect the Vatican to attempt to put together a team, but I do think this is an opportunity to recognize that derby is not a worldwide sport. It is mostly limited to developed nations (I recognize the inherent linguistic issue with that term, but it's all I have at the moment). If derby is really going to spread, if we can have a world cup that does reflect the amazing beauty and diversity of the world, we need to consider how to make the sport more accessible in the face of economic and cultural differences. And I have no idea how to do that, but I think if we as an increasingly worldwide community start talking about it, using the world cup as a chance for derby players to talk to each other, we're rolling in the right direction.

Getting Lapped by the Best: Derby Celebrities

2011-10-17T12:47:00.002-04:00

Last Wednesday, I had a brush with fame. While skating the the North London Optimist Community Centre in London, Ontario, a friend of mine pointed out Killson, a FCDG player and a member of Team Canada for the 2011 1st Annual Roller Derby World Cup. We fangirled over her skating posture and general coolness. The experience provided a good example of what celebrity means in roller derby.

Not the only star on the flat-track.

Because of roller derby's DIY-nature and outsider status, we don't have our own versions of Anna Kournikova or Derek Jeter - though I'm sure they'd both be great on quads. I think the most famous derby player at the moment is Suzy Hotrod, jammer for Gotham Girls Roller Derby All-Stars and the Queens of Pain, who was profiled in ESPN's 2011 Bodies We Want Issue (warning: link leads to naked folks, NSFW). But for the most part, even derby players famous within the sport have day-jobs and put their booty shorts on one leg at a time, like everyone else.

As roller derby grows, naturally the gap between star players and fans may widen. Until then, even our best remain pretty regular (or highly irregular) women. They aren't paid. They aren't endorsing anything. They probably aren't on steroids. In roller derby culture, your hero can be the girl sitting next to you on the bench.

Credit: Natalie 'Vegas' Buragina

Most sports do tend to breed heroes, it's true. But how many, say, hockey fans can say they were lapped by Sidney Crosby? Last week, I skated on the same rink as a member of the team representing my country at the first roller derby world cup ever. A friend of mine almost crashed into her. It was awesome. One of things I love about roller derby is that the absolute queens of our sport are still players, still just women on skates, chasing the track.

The Roller Rink: Not Just for Birthday Parties in the 1950's

2011-10-13T08:00:00.001-04:00

For aspiring roller derby skaters, the local roller rink is a crucial resource that often goes overlooked. One of the keys to improving is practice, but skaters often get caught up in the idea that they can only skate during team practices or when the weather outside is conducive to getting your quads on. While outdoor skating is a fabulous habit (and teaches you to look out for cars), rink skating is usually available on a consistent basis, relatively cheaply (even if you’re renting skates, you can usually get away with $12 Canadian or less), and skating at the rink means skating in company, which can be great for your motivation. Being lapped by someone’s grandmother might be demoralizing at first, but you’ll soon learn from watching experienced skaters and trying your best to keep up.

Rink skating has its downsides. Skating with a crowd of strangers can be intimidating. For more experienced skaters, the crowd might be an annoyance you can’t hip-check your way through. The music selection can be iffy and couples’ skating is no fun unless you’ve come to the rink with friends. The better you know your local rink, the better you’ll be able to navigate its foibles.

With all of those caveats in mind, roller rinks give you what you really need, namely the time to improve. You may not be able to determine what you learn during team practice, but in the rink, your time is basically your own. Usually the inner circle of the rink is open for skills practice and more often than not, there are experienced skaters willing to provide some guidance. (For extra points, check in with skaters in your league and ask if they’re going. Get a group in the habit of going and your skills and motivation will quickly ramp up.)

So, if it’s your first time at the rink, here are five quick suggestions for a successful trip.

1)Bring water. You will get sweaty if you’re doing this right.
2)Invite other skaters. Offer gas money or a ride. Company will keep you motivated.
3)On your breaks, pick a skater and watch how their technique. Mirror them once you’re back on skates.
4)Bring a snack with you to keep your energy up.
5)Boogie. Seriously. It’ll keep you working on your balance and no-one stands out for looking strange at a roller rink.

For Canadian rinks, look here and here for rinks in Ontario. For rinks in the US and other countries, check here. And don’t forget your skate rental fee in addition to the entry fee, if you don’t have skates of your own yet. Nobody likes shoe prints on the rink floor.

Getting Back on Skates + Fitness Challenge

2011-10-10T10:39:00.000-04:00

Due to starting up my PhD, my actual time on skates has been pretty much nil. For the same reason, my time to blog has been basically nonexistent. After some hair-tearing and soul-searching, I put my skates back on last Friday. I've also decided to keep blogging on Mondays and Thursdays, so please check back on those days for new posts.

Last Friday was the beginning of LOCO's Best Fit You challenge. Skaters can, if they choose, compete in three areas, each with its own 10-skate card as a prize. Our areas are highest percentage of weight loss, highest percentage of improvement for a fitness test, and a point-based day by day system of eating according to Canada's Food Guide. Some skaters are opposed to the food guide challenge, others to the weight loss, but I decided to try all three. Though I'm not a fan of the weight-loss challenge (for reasons of size acceptance), I took part largely because I don't have a scale at home and I was curious to see whether there would be any corresponding change in my weight after the challenge.

But I digress. Getting back on skates can be intimidating. I hadn't skated in ages. I was worried that my fellow skaters would have continued getting more awesome while I was hunched over Ulysses in the PhD1 cave. This of course was indeed the case, but I was welcomed back regardless. I chose to work with the newer skaters, because my skill acquisition has been a bit patchwork and my T-stops are terrible. (They still are.)

In some ways, the Best Fit You challenge was incredibly well-timed. It gave me a clear starting point to get back on my quads and a clear structure of activity and nutrition aimed toward a specific end-point. Structure can be key to getting back on skates: often, we've stopped skating because we stopped making time for it. Having the sense that the structure is being imposed for us (in this case, in the form of a league-wide challenge) can make getting back on skates seem easier than it really is. Am I advocating tricking yourself into skating? Frankly, yes.

League or team challenges can be a great way of encouraging absent skaters to get back in the game. It's not really about winning: it's about having these structures ready-made for skaters who are looking for reasons to skate but aren't great at self-motivating.

Now, I'm off lose a point for drinking coffee. It's totally worth it.

The Game of the Name: Roller Derby Monikers

2011-09-27T07:42:00.002-04:00

A roller derby player has several things in common with a superhero. A costume. Super powers (booty blocking included). Fans. And a secret identity.

Every player has her on-track persona, exemplified by her name. Our very own Team Canada has Killson from FCDG, Rainbow Fight from 709 Derby Girls, Georgia W Tush from Montreal . And these women are superheroes on skates, make no mistake.

Derby names range from the cute to the punny to the frankly frightening. And every one is unique – see for yourself. It’s true that there are some suspiciously similar names, but the roster is vetted for those. Once a name is put on there, it can’t be copied.

I recently read a really interesting post on derby names that posited that in order for the sport to move forward, names need to be vetted for content as well as originality. The post correctly points out that sexist, misogynistic or offensive names shouldn’t have a place in derby.

But it can be difficult to separate sexist from sexy and offensive from outspoken. There are terms I use that some might argue don’t have a place in family-friendly roller derby. For example, I have no problem with positive reclamation of the word 'cunt' (Man, my Google hits are about to take a sudden left turn). And here’s where I disagree with the idea that derby names need to be policed for the good of the sport.

Roller derby is not soccer. It’s a sport that was rooted in crash commercialism and then revived and literally taken over by the women who played it. It’s not just a sport: it’s a battleground. Roller derby is typified by a DIY esthetic and an in-your-face bravado. It’s not a typical sport, nor should it be.

It’s not that I don’t think derby should spread. It’s doing that as we speak, crass names and all. But do I want roller derby in the Olympics? Frankly, no (and not just because several team sports like baseball aren’t either). To me, roller derby is best as an outsider sport and not because I want us to get to keep all the derby goodness to ourselves. I want derby to grow without compromising what makes it special, namely that DIY principle, that feminist practice, that outrageous name on the back of a jersey.

But let's remember, folks: if your name isn't worthy of a superheroine, maybe you should reconsider, not for the sport, but for the players and fans around you. While you're busy being your own hero, you might be someone else's, too.

3ZH4SAGBVFUR

Business Review - Rollergirl

2011-09-23T08:15:00.000-04:00

Today is our first business review, in which I'll describe my experience buying from a roller derby-related business. I thought I would start off by reviewing Rollergirl, a Canadian-owned, derby-owned business located in Vancouver, British Columbia. Here are the details.

What I Had Heard Prior to my Purchase: Rollergirl came highly recommended by my fellow skaters. Their site has great resources for skaters and good selection. My biggest concern was pricing: I'm a derby girl on a budget and Rollergirl has only one yearly sale. It's a substantial sale, depending on what you're buying. This year, the best deals were on wheels, largely. Rollergirl also sponsors leagues, which is pretty cool.

The Buy: Riedell 265s with Flatout Wheels and Bones REDS bearings
Skate Tool
Riedell Toe Snouts

The Process: Before purchasing the skates, I was concerned about sizing. Since this was my first pair of new skates, I had originally wanted to buy them in a brick and mortar store, so I could be sure of the sizing. Since I couldn't find the price or model I wanted in London or Toronto, I decided to lie in wait for the yearly sale.

Rollergirl offers a sizing guarantee and has employees available by phone or email to guide you through the sizing process. Sizing is usually guaranteed - if the skates you order don't fit, they'll pay all shipping costs involved in the exchange except for international orders outside the U.S.

In my case, I emailed back and forth with an employee ahead of the sale, because they do not answer the phone or emails on the day of the sale.

Rollergirl.ca

The Result: All my gear arrived safely and in a timely fashion, considering I'd ordered the cheapest shipping. The package contained detailed instructions for attaching my toe snouts, which was a life-saver. I was a very satisfied customer.

Verdict: Rollergirl is a great online retailer. The customer service was unparalleled. However, prices can seem a bit steep, given just how much equipment is needed for derby. I would recommend waiting for Rollergirl's early spring sale and/or consider splitting shipping costs with a league-mate. Check to see if your league is sponsored by Rollergirl. Follow their sizing instructions if they apply to your purchase.

Details: Rollergirl's website
Rollergirl's Store
Returns Policy

What's in a Derby Name? Choosing Your Persona

2011-09-21T08:23:00.000-04:00

At the risk of passing on whatever Lovecraftian illness I have, which does seem to be aggressive enough to spread itself via blog posts, today we're talking choosing a derby name (more on the derby name as a phenomenon later this week).

Often, new roller derby players have a name in mind before they've tried their skates on. Others have months to find the right one. In both cases, they sometimes end up finding it's already taken by checking the International Rollergirl's Master Roster, (as we all must). When I started out, I was devastated "Bettie Rage" and "Pain Austen" had already been scooped up. Whether you're just starting out considering the name you'll give to your derby life or you've come back to the drawing board, here's one model of picking your name and then some suggestions more generally.

When I started skating, I made a list of names I liked. Being a grad student in the humanities, I went largely for puns related to literature. When the more obvious ones were taken (though "Charlotte Brawn-te" is still free, I think) I got creative. Not every skater uses a pun for her name, but I'm very into puns, so making weak plays on words felt natural to me. In the midst of a brainstorming session (and boy, was there a list of at least fifteen possible names), I thought of "Cthulhu Lemon", riffing on H.P. Lovecraft's "Call of Cthulhu", a cosmic horror story, and LuluLemon, purveyor of expensive yoga gear.

Terrible, Terrible Photoshop by me. Yes, that is a Lemon

In my case, I risked a lot of folks not getting my name or even knowing how to pronounce it. With my stutter, I myself have a lot of trouble with the hard 'C' at the beginning of my derby name. I can admit that this is at least a bit funny. I'm often Lemon for short. These were things I should have considered, though accessibility and pronunciation will matter more or less depending on the player. All in all, I love my name because it's geeky and weird and that's me on or off the track.

Seven Suggestions For Selecting Your Sobriquet

1) For guidance, try picking a theme. Celebrity names are often a go-to (our league has Kat von Damage). Riffs on your real name are also a possibility (hence our Killer Suenami). Do you want it to relate to your hobbies, your work (our own Sewer Princess works for the city), your own personality, or on the flipside, something with nothing to do with your real life at all?
2) Get ideas from friends and family. You'll get some groaners, sure, but they may surprise you.
3) Brainstorm, brainstorm, brainstorm. Have back-ups. There are a lot of derby girls out there and some of them might already have the name you want. Don't just change one letter so you get to be "Betteee Rage". Get creative. Having a great derby name is a point of pride.
4) Consider how the name will shape the expectations of other players. Do you want to seem fast, sly ...homicidal? Consider how it will make *you* feel to be called by a certain name or a shortened version of this name.
5) Check your name out. Is it offensive? Is it misogynistic? Remember this is a representation of you and your league. This is what you might be called while playing for your country at the Roller Derby World Cup, if you're particularly awesome.
6) Consider the implications of your name more directly. If it's a joke, do you care if people get it? Are you willing to explain if necessary? (Warning: this *can* be a bit of a hassle, but it's worth it if you love it.)
7) Check out resources like Rollergirl's Guide to picking your name, SVRG's Ultimate Guide, or Cherry Rockette's guide, which is particularly good for laying out considerations for the Master Roster.

Get your thinking helmets on, ladies.

Take Back The Night...On Skates!

2011-09-18T14:25:00.004-04:00

On September 15th, I and several of my league-mates volunteered to be safety-sisters for London, Ontario's Take Back the Night march. For those who don't know (and until recently, that included me) Take Back The Night is a rally and march, held internationally, that brings women and allies together to protest violence against women, partriarchy, and the simple fact that as a twenty-three year old woman living in a city, I get nervous walking home alone at night.

Photo Credit Mike Maloney London Community News

Our London-VP suggested we volunteer for the march as a way of continuing our league's commitment to community involvement. Several skaters attended, some, including myself, on foot. We were safety-sisters, which meant that we wore orange and yellow reflective neon vests and walked or skated along the street median, so marchers would know not to walk past us and cars wouldn't hit anyone. It was honestly a little bit harrowing. Several times vehicles sped up as they passed us, potentially endangering members of a crowd of about 400 people. But we cheered and chanted anyway.

On my way to the rally, I was in a wretched mood. But when I got there, I was stunned by the joy and passion of the crowd and the organizers. When we marched, women shouted and waved to pedestrians and cars and drivers honked back. A contingent of male supporters applauded us from the sidewalk, holding up a banner that said "Men Against Violence Against Women". I was buoyed up by all the positive energy, all the intensity of feeling that rode through the street, contained only by a dotted line of women in neon vests.

As is probably obvious by now, my roller derby is feminist. I put on my skates as a feminist activist and I love the sport for many reasons, but chiefly because it is a sport that encourages women to know one another, to work together, to compete productively. For me, having roller derby players skate for a feminist march is not merely logical, but also the coming-together of two things I fiercely love.

What's next on my feminist agenda? I'm going to improve my transitions because I'm back on skate this week!

Fat Derby + Five Things You Can Do to Encourage It

2011-09-16T08:29:00.000-04:00

What does it mean to be a fat roller derby player?

As discussed in a previous post, the face of derby is usually a very particular one: slim-waisted and large-breasted. Team logos and posters and other facets of the public persona of derby almost always feature slim women or stereotypical pin-up proportions. This is odd given that derby in actuality embraces lots of sizes. You do not have to be a size 4 (and a D cup to boot) to block, or even to jam, though smaller players are often assumed to be jammer material. You can be a large player and still kick derby behind. It can be difficult, however, for players to speak and act the fat-acceptance the sport seems to encourage, while derby culture simultaneously places fat players under erasure.

(A side-note on language here: I am not using the word fat in a derogatory way. I am a believer in fat-acceptance and an enemy of body-shaming. Size is not a sure indicator of health. Fat-acceptance activists continue to work on reclaiming the word 'fat' and I'm going to respect their work enough to use it myself.)

by winterbutterfly81 on DeviantArt, quote from Julie Garwood

Derby needs players of all sizes. The greater our base of would-be players, the better our sport can be. That's not to say that we should overhaul roller derby for the masses and that we should rob the sport of what makes it wonderful, namely the DIY aesthetic, the focus on women working together, and the sport's ingrained humour. But we do need to look critically at how, regardless of our intentions, we actively encourage some women to play and discourage others. As players and supporters of the sport, we have a hand in shaping it every time we play, every time we hang out with each other, every time we tack up a bout poster. Are you doing enough to encourage women of all sizes to join the roller derby family?

Some people might say that fatness is inherently at odds with being a good derby skater, that athleticism requires being slim and toned. I must call bull-shit on that one. A player's skill on the rink relates to their dedication, practice, endurance, speed, and a host of other things that are not necessarily dictated by a player's weight. Fitness is the key there, not weight. There are players in my league who are fatter than me but frequently skate circles around me.

Even more importantly, roller derby is not just a sport, it's a movement. It's one of the few women-focused areas we have that isn't solely defined by outmoded stereotypes of what women 'should' be. We have a duty to the women we play with to keep roller derby a positive space for women.

So how do we do this? How do we help roller derby progress? Here's five ideas.

1) We look more closely at how we brand our sport through logos, posters, and league websites. We make those representations of players more inclusive by featuring different sizes, by talking to the artists we work with.

2) We demand better from the companies we buy from. If their knee-pads only go up to an M/L and that's not big enough for you or some of your league-members, write to the company. Tell them they need to do better and they just might.

3) We demand more from the third-party companies who don't make merchandise, but do sell it. Ask where their fat models are. Offer to be one. Suggest merchandise with sizing and/or support for players of all sizes.

4) Eliminate body-shaming from your derby vocabulary. Stop saying "Oh, my thighs look awful in these short-shorts" when the player next to you, regardless of size, might have thought she looked pretty fine in her hotpants right up until you said that. Self-hatred has no place in roller derby. It catches. Judge yourself by your skill and dedication, not your size. Encourage your fellow players to do the same.

5) Talk. Organize. Educate yourself on the challenges fat players face. Look up fat derby bloggers and activists and get in touch with them. My league president has a fab fat derby blog at Vansterdamn XXX: True Adventures of a Big-Ass Derby Girl. Consider blogging yourself. We need more voices if we're going to have a good conversation.

In short, love your derby self and make damn sure you're encouraging your team-mates to do the same.

Fresh Meat Resources

2011-09-14T00:50:00.000-04:00

Today, we link. Below are fresh meat resources, divided roughly by area and type. This list is by no means exhaustive and if you find a good resource, please include it in the comments! Lessons learned while researching this? I'm a little in love with Bonnie D. Stroir, but who isn't? Also, we need more posts and pages devoted to derby skills and skating technique training.

Meat chunks above, information chunks below.

Fresh Meat Basics / Misc.

Rollergirl's Fresh Meat File : basic but wide-spread in terms of coverage. A must.

More generally, Rollergirl's Info Page with basic skating, sizing, and gear maintenance This might save your skates.

Roller Derby Endurance Tips: Overview of suggested workouts to up your endurance, a must on the track.

The Roller Derby Resource: Roller Derby Skating Skills. These people know everything.

Skills and Technique

(This area was especially lacking in my searches. We need more info!)

Bay City Bombers' Training Guide Comprehensive, drawn from a great deal of experience.

Striding Techniques for Skaters: Some links are outdated but it's a good start.

Instructional Videos (all on Youtube)

Derby Form by Stray Cat of Central Coast Roller Derby

Stops by Stray Cat

Crossovers by Stray Cat

Pack-Skating Basics by Stray Cat

Backwards Skating by Stray Cat

Sideways Skating by the San Diego Derby Dolls

Knee Slides by Stray Cat

Double Knee Slides by Stray Cat

Power Slides by the SDDD

Whips and Pushes by Stray Cat

Leg Whips by the SDDD

Backwards Whips and Blocks by the SDDD

Endurance by Stray Cat

Blocking by Stray Cat

Destructive Blocking by the San Diego Derby Dolls

Juking by the SDDD

Transitions by Expertvillage

Evasive Transitions by the SDDD

Specific Blog Posts

Roller Derby Disorder: Keeping all your derby crap clean. Know this from day one. Excellent linkage.

Derby Girls Blog: Guest Post by Rockquelle Damage of the Denver Wreckin' Roller Rebels. Great tips on how to increase your chances of derby success by making small changes in your day-to-day life.

Queen of the Rink's top seven tips for fresh meat. Concise and smart.

The Paper Ecdysiast: Fresh Meat Tips. In case you missed last week's outing.

Fresh Meat Blogs

Fresh Meat: Tales From Derby Wannabes Their substantial archive is particularly noteworthy for the edification of freshies. More anecdotal than instructional, but awesome all the same.

Diary of a DerbyWannabe, particularly their Ten Goals in Ten Months Section Bright blog, great insight into the fresh meat tenderization process.

Start your own. Here, for example. Or here.

Zebra Love

2011-09-12T08:32:00.000-04:00

The zebra was one of my favourite animals when I was a kid. It was like a horse, but with a cooler paint job. Today, the zebras I interact with are human ones - the fine referees of roller derby. Assuming you're not playing renegade derby, you need refs if you want to play the game. And derby is a damn complicated game.

Some of my favourite leagues, like Terminal City, list their refs as a kind of team all their own. When it comes down to it, refs have to pass their own skills testing, they have to know WFTDA rules inside and out and they have to deal with derby girls. It's not glamourous, but it is pretty bad-ass. As the Montreal Roller Derby Referees' page says, "No pain and no glory, not vain nor scary, just a simple concoction: Respect, rules and execution." Our zebras are part of what makes the derby machine run. They tell you that you're the lead jammer, they send you and your booty-shorts to the penalty seat.

When I first started practicing, I was struck by the seeming fact that refs were almost always male. Women's derby has two particular roles men can play, namely referees and coaches. At first, it irked me that these positions of authority were held by guys. Couldn't women ref? Couldn't women coach? Wasn't patriarchy one of the things we went to derby to escape, at least for the duration of a two-minute jam? It bothered me that a sport I identified as feminist just seemed to reinscribe tired gender stereotypes by having the women in fishnets and the men in positions of power. I've since learned that lots of women do both of these things, but the majority of women prefer to skate because that's what they came for. Skating is the sexy part. Reffing is a different kind of hard.

My league has several refs we know and love and these range from home-grown officials to volunteers we've borrowed from other leagues. My refs have taught me how to manage the penalty box and my refs have shown me how to handle my gear better. Referees are crucial resources for players, especially new ones, to learn about the game, their gear, and skating technique. So, in short, I say show your zebras some love today and ask them a question. These folks know their stuff.

Fresh Meat Tips

2011-09-09T08:33:00.001-04:00

Today, we're going to go over my top five tips for fresh meat before, during and after their first few skates. Mostly these are things I wish I had known or wish my mama hens had shouted at least one more time so it might get through my baby duck head. Without further ado...

BEFORE skating

1) Stretch. Stretch, stretch, stretch. Try to get in the habit of doing it every day. It's good for your body.
2) Get to know your equipment. Check out resources like Rollergirl's guide to skate maintenance.
3) Hydrate. Fill a glass of water. Drink it. Repeat. Skating will have you sweating and being dehydrated will slow you down and distract you from learning.
4) Know your derby. Look up instructional videos on Youtube, like this one on skating. Check out the full rules on WFTDA and, again, Youtube for the basics.
5) Relax! You're a baby duck. You'll learn as fast as you need to.

WHILE skating

1) BEND YOUR KNEES. Seriously. You think you're low? Get lower. Bending your knees will improve your balance and leave you with less distance to cover when you fall.
2) Speaking of falling, practice falling on your knees. One knee, both knees. Do it until your body does it automatically when you start to lose your balance, otherwise you will fall on your bum and risk serious injuries.
3) Ask questions. Your league should have trainers, but I don't know a derby girl who isn't invested on getting the skaters around them to skate better.
4) Remember that hydrating? Do it some more! Afraid you'll need a bathroom break? If you haven't gone to the bathroom in skates, you haven't lived. Also, you can take your gear off. There is always time for bathroom breaks.
5) Pick a skater whose skills you admire. Watch how she skates. Imitate her. This will engage your learning and very possibly get you a date.

AFTER skating

1) Stretch! We often cool-down by skating only and stretching is a key habit to get into.
2) Socialize! Go out to the bar afterward (even if you don't drink) or get in on social events. Getting to know the other girls can be hard at first, but the better you know your league, the likelier it is you'll keep going.
3) Analyze your successes and areas for improvement, but don't punish yourself. Ask your trainers if they noticed anything you really need to practice, then do so.
4) Find other skating opportunities. The more you skate, the better you will be. Look up local arenas if the season isn't outdoor skate-friendly. Offer to drive / pay for gas with other girls.
5) Use the internet to supplement what you've learned on-skate. Check out derby blogs. They're a 24-hour resource and the internet is a big place.

In closing, skate on, freshies. Everyone starts out fresh. Learn and pass on what you learn. Maybe even blog about it?

Derby Wifery

2011-09-07T18:09:00.000-04:00

I do not have a derby wife. It's not that I disapprove of derby marriage, it's more that I'd feel awkward, perhaps even silly asking one of the girls in my league to be mine. Would they think I was secretly hitting on them? Would I be? Do I want to be a derby husband instead? These are the questions I'm faced when I consider foregoing my derby bachelorette-hood.

Some of you might be asking, "What exactly is a derby wife, again?" A derby wife is a woman, presumably on your team or in your league, who is your go-to girl, your derby soul-mate. A surprising number of definitions online describe her as the one holding your hair back while you vomit, which either tells us something about roller derby or about the people trying to define the sport's culture. Simply put, your derby wife is your number one support - she might keep you motivated to stay skate-ready, she might untie your skates for you after you've hit the ground and are too dazed to deal with things like shoelaces, she might call you on your shit when necessary. Your derby wife is your partner.

There are some criticisms of the convention of derby wives. There's concern that this kind of pairing off of besties is a retreading of the kind of cliqueish behaviour that drove so many of us away from the society of other women in the first place. It can be easy to feel excluded when surrounded by intense bonds. I think those concerns have merit. Everyone in a league deserves the best possible chance of feeling welcomed and sometimes we forget how hard it can be to take those first steps into making friends with total strangers. If we are to support derby wife culture, we need to make sure we don't forget about the single ladies putting their hands up.

Because the derby wife phenomenon can be a wonderful thing. It's at the heart of what makes derby great: women coming together to support and challenge each other. Female friendship is incredibly fraught with societal pressures about competing with other women, particularly for male attention and the various successes of womanhood, namely marriage, babies, etc (which are not in and of themselves bad things). It can be incredibly hard to have healthy friendships with other women while operating within that system.

As I've said before in this blog, so many of my friends in derby have said, "I've never really had many female friends before roller derby". Roller derby creates a space where we compete on the track and we leave it on the track. When the clock isn't going, we allow ourselves just to be friends without the heinous fuckery of worrying our friends are thinner, prettier, and more adequate women than we are. And whether we want to identify one player as the focal point of that friendship and support or (like me) stay a derby lothario, we still engage in a community of female friendship that can be crucial to a woman's self-care.

So, I say, if you have your eye on a derby girl, feel free to make an 'honest' woman of her. But don't forget your sisters of skate, at least not once the honeymoon is over.

Slight delay

2011-09-07T07:38:00.000-04:00

Today's blog post on derby wifedom will be showing up later tonight, my time. In the mean time, here's a picture of the Kitchener LOCO logo. Their Roll-a-Thon will be taking place on September 25th. Further details from their poster below!

Join your Kitchener LOCO Roller Derby skaters for a roll down
the Iron Horse Trail, from Victoria Park to Union Blvd and back!

Roll with us on your roller/inline skates, skateboard, or bicycle.

Any donation amount is welcome & appreciated! (Cash only please)

25% of all profits will be donated to the YMCA Strong Kids Campaign.

Meet @ 2:00 pm, Victoria Park Pavillion (Parking available)
Roll out @ 2:15 pm. Rain or shine.

CSI: Miami "Wheels Up" Review

2011-09-05T08:21:00.000-04:00

The only thing the CSI series is more famous for than showing 'graphic forensic content' at dinnertime is exploiting subcultures (furries, kinky people, you name it) to make murder investigations even more exciting. CSI tends to go for research over understanding, which in the case of roller derby representation, might actually be a good thing, because one of the most common complaints about derby in popular culture is factual mistakes. As promised last week, we're going to discuss the episode today.

So, how did CSI: Miami do? "Wheels Up" features the team attempting to find the killer of roller derby jammer Wrath of Connie. Along the way, they bump up against players, refs, boyfriends, brothers and an announcer who won't shut up - the typical roller derby crowd.

First, the pros of the episode: derby is shown fairly accurately. As you can see in the picture above, they have the gear seemingly right (see the pivot helmet panty?). They show players getting up in the penalty box (which looks like a prop in an exotic dancer club, but more on that later), they don't purely show derby as wrestling on skates. Players have individual personalities and back-stories. They even show a player who was seriously injured in a bout, leading to life-changing consequences. The representation of derby often doesn't get past the rink or address the fact that roller derby's sexy danger can have consequences, so it's heartening to see CSI doing so.

One particularly good aspect of the episode is an emotional explanation of what a 'derby wife' is, namely a fellow player you count on as your special derby buddy, your skate-sister, the person who gets in the ambulance with you. I know the derby wife phenomenon isn't popular with every player (more on this later in the week), but it's an aspect of derby often glossed over and in this episode, Wrath of Connie's relationship with her derby wife is one of the healthiest connections depicted in the hour.

Also, it's a bit of a True Blood reunion. Lindsay Pulsipher, who plays Crystal on TB, plays an injured derby player here. Todd Lowe, who plays the amazing Terry Bellefleur, plays a complete jerk here, albeit one on a motorcycle, so if that's your thing, watch this. Also, someone punches Ryan, so it's a good hour in television history.

Now, the cons: the show heavily relied on roller derby stereotypes to get its foot in the door. The official tagline from CBS publicity was "When the CSIs investigate a murder at a roller derby match, the only thing shorter than the girls' skirts are their tempers". You know, the usual. There are catfights. The girls are largely aggressive, even threatening, but almost never unsexy. A key plot rests on metal-reinforced elbow pads which would never pass WFTDA regulations and I strongly suspect would cost a player their spot on a team if discovered. The spirit of roller derby is still misunderstood here, I think.

Their "Sin Bin" isn't regulation (it only has room for one skater), but it's in keeping with the sexy vibe the show is going for. Also, helmet hair is often suspiciously absent. Personally, I like my derby girls realistically gross, but the show apparently disagreed. The largely male CSI team dealing with the girls at the match and commenting by saying things like "I don't whether I'm scared or turned on" might be a deconstruction of the role of the male gaze in derby, but I doubt it. Largely, the team is there to get frightened and turned on , as is the viewership of CSI (let's be honest here).

Ultimately, the episode "Wheels Up" isn't bad. I was pleasantly surprised, even. But will someone tell the writers Corey Evett and Matthew S. Partney not to bother raising the spectre of the obsessive, potentially lesbian desire-fueled room-mate? The only lesbian panic I want in my roller derby is being shocked to find we don't have enough of them and going out to get more.

Roller Derby Iconography: The League Logo

2011-09-02T08:10:00.000-04:00

I'd like to blog today about oneparticular piece of visual derby culture, the league logo. A league'slogo is often their first point of contact with the public. It goeson their t-shirts, it features on their website, it is in a veryliteral way, the league's face. More generally, the logo stands infor the league's players, telling potential supporters, skaters andopponents what to expect from that community of players.

How do league logos represent the womenand men who play the sport? Common themes include circular logos,skaters (often in pin-up poses), helmets, fists, wings skates andskulls, sometimes skulls with eyelashes (as can be seen here andhere). Logos tend to incorporate themes of speed, violence andfemininity, often coloured by the 'personality' of the city in whichthe team plays (i.e. the London Rollergirls). Our logos often speakin what is assumed to be the visual short-hand of derby: girls inskates, gorgeous gams, and potential gore. Because of this, logosthat eschew a) a circular shape, b) a human figure and c) violenticonography often don't look like we tend to assume a league logoshould. This is why, for example, Northwest Arkansas Roller Derbystands out from most league logos.

Actually, I'd like to do a fewshout-outs to leagues that, for whatever reason, choose to representthemselves without using human figures. These leagues stand out. InCanada, two of my favourite examples are the Forest City Derby Girls,who represent themselves with a flaming tree and the 709 Derby Girls,who have a damn straightforward logo. South of the border, theSilicon Valley Roller Girls' use of eye-catching text make them lookiconic. Further afield from my laptop in London, Ontario, Canada, Ifind the Barcelona logo scary, which is kind of hot. Logos withouthuman figures on them rather neatly sidestep the issue of how best torepresent players (who have many different types of bodies) with one,static body.

Because one of the most common andfraught images on roller derby league logos really is that of awoman. Before I did my initial research for this post, I washard-pressed to think of leagues that had logos featuring women whodid not possess stereotypical 'pin-up' dimensions, featuring largebreasts and hips and very small waists. For a sport that depends on womenof all sizes, derby often tends to represent itself using only onebody type. But I was very pleasantly surprised to be reminded thatsome leagues choose to represent themselves with logos featuringwomen of a more 'weighty'* size. One of my current favourite logos is that of the RageCity Rollergirls, basically because she looks a lot more like me thatmost derby logo girls do (I also have short hair and piercings,neither of which often crop up in derby logos, but that's beside thepoint).

Of course, it needs to be recognizedthat derby logos are heavily influenced by Sailor Jerry-styled tattooart and pin-ups more generally. Take a look at the WFTDA League pageand you'll see a lot of anchors, wings, skulls, brass knuckles andgirls drawn to look sexy by the conventions of SJ's heyday (that'snot to say they aren't sexy now, but that the boundaries of sexy aremuch less narrow than this). This visual aesthetic is pretty solidlypart of derby culture. That's not to say it can't be both appreciated and questioned.

One of the most telling differencesbetween roller derby and, well, most other popular sports, most ofwhich are played by men, can be read in a logo. How often do see malebodies in sports team logos? That's not to say that men's bodies arenever depicted in these logos (see the MLB logo and the NBA logo),but it occurs less pervasively than the image of the female body doesin derby, and is almost never sexualized to the same degree. (SexyToronto Bluejays, anyone? The fanart must exist.)

Is this a problem? I'm asking thisquestion genuinely. I have friends who avoid derby specificallybecause of the sport's perceived sexism and friends who love derby because it is a real sport involving strong, sexy womenand no mud-wrestling. I know players, myself included, for whom beingon the track does make them feel sexy, for whom wearing fishnets andbooty shorts is a reclaiming of their bodies in the face of a culturewho would like them to wear these outfits only if they match a certain body type. How do we balance keeping roller derby empowering withoutresorting to slut-shaming a whole sport?

Personally, I'm not put off by aleague's 'sexy' logo. I just wish derby had a broader definition ofwhat sexy means.

* A note on size: derby players andpeople more generally come in all shapes and sizes, ranging from thevery slim to the very weighty. The purpose of this discussion is notto put slim players or those with 'hourglass' figures under erasure.I think derby logos should feature all different types of bodies!

Whip It Review and Derby in Popular Film

2011-08-31T08:00:00.007-04:00

Whip It is a 2009 Ellen Page vehicle directed by Drew Barrymore and based on Shauna Cross' novel Derby Girl. In the film, Bliss (Page) discovers roller derby, despite the limitations of living in a small Texas town under the watchful eye of her mother (Marcia Gay Harden), who makes her compete in local beauty pageants. Supporting characters include her best friend Pash (Alia Shawkat), intriguing musician Oliver (Landon Pigg) and roller derby ladies such as Smashley Simpson (Barrymore), Maggie Mayhem (Kristen Wiig), and Rosa Sparks (Eve).

Let's be frank: if you're reading this blog, you've probably already seen Whip It. Some of you might have come to derby specifically because seeing Whip It sparked or finally confirmed your interest in derby. Personally, I received a DVD copy of the film as a birthday present around the same time I started playing and planned a special showing with my partner, only to get impatient and watch it in secret. If you haven't seen the film, do so.

Whip It is good but not stellar. It's funny but impaired by a lot of sport movie and coming of age cliches. (My partner did give it points for having an actual sport tactic matter to the film's climax, however.) Its representation of derby culture, ranging from the physical challenges, to female rivalries and friendships to the often male coaches and implied male spectatorship is mostly spot-on. The game itself is misrepresented, as derby often is in television and film, as a no-boundaries contact sport, rather than a full-contact sport with checking but, say, no elbows to the face. For those who do want roller derby without penalties, this is what you're looking for.

The film's relationship with women is a mixed bag – it can be rightly commended as a feminist film, but one still perpetuating some tired stereotypes about women's bodies and (spoilers! Highlight to read) sex and what its relationship is to a woman's value. Bliss' mother misses a chance to correct this and it's sad to watch. As a fun film for derby enthusiasts and a fairly solid introduction to what roller derby can mean to a woman who feels frustrated by social or cultural limits on what she can do, Whip It does the job.

More broadly, Whip It is a good sign of the proliferation of roller derby culture. It's a derby film, penned and directed by women, largely driven by a female cast. The actors were extensively trained to skate and even in London, ON, our local Forest City Derby Girls partnered with a cinema to promote the sport at the film's premiere. That is astoundingly cool. At the same time, Whip It was a middling critical success and a definite commercial flop. And we need more roller derby films, more successful examples of the sport being depicted in entertainment. (Fun Fact: Zoe Bell, who played Bloody Holly in the film also played a roller derby player in the CSI: Miami episode, “Wheels Up” in 2011, which I'll review next week. Zoe was also Xena's stunt double.)

Modern roller derby has seemed to find more lasting success thus far when depicted in documentary style. The recent Hell on Wheels (reviewed by me here) and the A&E-tastic Rollergirls and the myriad of short derby docs making the rounds on Youtube (Brutiful is one) have received more consistent attention. Whip It is one of a very small number of feature films that attempt to portray roller derby as part of a story (the Rollerball remake with Chris Klein and LL Cool J does not count). And as I said, Whip It isn't perfect.

But it's pretty cool to have a solid roller derby film that isn't old enough to have featured a young Mickey Rooney.

That's How We Became The Derby Bunch

2011-08-29T08:05:00.001-04:00

Yesterday, LOCO held its second annual Skate-A-Thon. I've blogged previously about the event, which features both derby girls and picnics. Together, LOCO's skaters raised $950 dollars, 25% of which goes to YMCA Strong Kids with the remainder going to the league. Skaters from LOCO raised pledges with the promise that they would skate around London's park walkways for an hour, before settling down to eat burgers and remarkably good desserts.

Photo credit: Natalie 'Vegas' Buragina

I myself skated for about fifteen minutes before face-planting halfway down a hill. Most of the folks who saw my left knee afterward asked, “Why weren't you wearing your knee pads?” I was. Friction is a powerful force. Luckily, so are mini cheesecakes. After lunch, I regretted nothing.

Because a lot of our skaters are moms, we had a great deal of derby kids with us yesterday, some well-approaching teenhood and some still learning to toddle. Seeing fellow players with their families is a bit like seeing them off-skate, only more so. One player's son likes to play with derby wheels. Another player can make balloon hats, much to the delight of all of the children and many of the adults. A league is a kind of sweaty, cobbled-together family and events like this remind us that derby leagues are really composed of several families, loaning us their sisters, moms and sons for a few practices a week.

Of course, having children isn't the only defining feature of a family. The league itself is proof of that. I suppose that's why I think social and community-oriented events are so necessary for the health of a league. The kind of bonding derby offers is sudden and intense. It's remarkable how crashing into someone can make you feel like you know them. And you do, in a way. But getting the chance to talk to your fellow players, to meet their friends and partners, to see them out of their knee socks makes the difference between, say, knowing Cthulhu Lemon on the track and knowing Meghan for the rest of the week off-skate.

There are a lot of powerful, hurtful stereotypes about friendships between women. We're often told by entertainment and media advertising told that female friendship is rooted solely in buying shoes together, or in mutual body insecurity or that female friendships whither in the face of the urge to pursue heterosexual bliss. Making friends with other women can be tough. A lot of players I've known have said some variation on, “I've never had many female friends.” When so many of these kinds of women get together, we get surprised by how much we often end up liking each other, even though we're not in a yogurt commercial.

Some players only come to roller derby for the exercise and the physical thrill of playing a fast-paced game. But the majority, I think, end up staying for the family. And the barbecue.

Queerying Derby + Derby in Transition

2011-08-26T10:08:00.000-04:00

When I first joined my derby league, I remember complaining to a friend, "I thought there would be more queer women."* What else had Whip It! taught me, if not that at roller derby after-parties, cute women would be seducing each other in the hot tub? Hadn't my league skated at Pride London? Where were all the gay ladies at? As it turned out, there were plenty of awesome women all over the sexuality spectrum. I had just assumed that I was alone.

Why were my expectations so specific? Women's sports are often stereotypically associated with the presence of gay ladies, which reminds us that the assumption that all gay women are butch and that all supposedly butch women are gay is still prevalent. And roller derby is seen as a very queer-positive sport in particular. In Toronto during Pride, there's the annual Clam Slam, a bout between queer derby players from all over Canada and the US. And what environment could be more conducive to bringing in queer women than a feminist, women-focused space that happens to feature the occasional pair of booty shorts?

As a queer derby player, I've always felt welcomed by my league. They really came to my attention because they skated in the 2010 Pride London Parade, which was part of why I assumed the league would be a queer haven. And it is. Though we can never rest and say, "Oh, we're supportive enough," I must say I'm happy with my league's attitude toward queer players.

One area where we (and by 'we', I mean every league, every player) need to keep working is trans issues. WFTDA's gender policy states that a female is someone "living as a woman and having sex hormones that are within the medically acceptable range for a female". While the fact that WFTDA is not perpetuating trans invisibility is a good thing, the policy is far from perfect. Some, myself included, would say it's still intensely discriminatory. Why?

In the first place, WFTDA's policy places the burden of 'proving' oneself to be a woman solely on the shoulders of trans players. As a cis-gendered woman, I simply don't have to jump through the same hoops that a trans player does. That's discrimination. Additionally, placing a player's status as a woman in a medical professional's hands robs that player of the right to simply say, "I am a woman," and be heard.

The issue of having hormones determine someone's sex, let alone their gender, is also dubious. When it comes down to it, there's no good way to 'test' for gender and sex except asking. Just ask. Ask and then take the answer at face value. I once had a (deeply transphobic) partner "accuse" me of being trans. While I couldn't care less if people think I'm trans (because trans people are brave and unbelievably strong and frankly, I'd take it as a compliment), I remember being deeply offended that my answer regarding my gender and sex wasn't assumed to be "honest". I felt trapped by that person's refusal to just believe me. I felt reduced to the status of a non-person, because my claim to my gender was, according to that person, supposedly insufficient.

In short, I believe the WFTDA policy needs to be changed if the sport is going to continue to progress and prove it really is a feminist sport we can be proud of. Read the policy and decide for yourself. But accord a fellow derby player the same respect you would give a friend or a person on the street. Believe them when they tell you who they are.

-

* A note on my language: I'm using the word 'queer' as an umbrella term for folks, in this case largely women, whose sexuality is not limited to opposite-sex attraction. I know not everyone likes the word queer, but it's my word and I use it freely.

Rolling on the Rag: Periods and Roller Derby

2011-08-24T11:08:00.005-04:00

For some of us, having our period signals a time when we retreat to heating pads, ibuprofen, and enough chocolate to kill Cathy. For others, it's derby as usual. Personally, when I'm grouchy and on painkillers anyway, it's a time when I like to go skating. Beyond sheer preference, having your period while at practice or bouting presents some practical concerns, namely regarding what to wear (and I don't mean fishnets or knee socks). Here's a brief overview of some of the menstrual products available to us and the pros and cons of wearing them while skating.

1) Disposable pads: pads aren't a popular choice. Derby is a prime producer of bum-sweat and by the end of practice, chances are you'll feel like you're wearing a soggy daiper. Pads can shift around as you skate, sweat and get bumped on the track, lessening their effectiveness. Add in that if you're wearing a pad with wings, things could get seriously chafed. Pads, in my experience, are poor for morale, though they'd provide some protection against a skate to the cooch. With that said, I can't recommend pads. Rating: one skate out of four.

1a) Reusable cloth pads: pads like the Lunapad are reusable and made out of cloth (duh). They score points for being more comfortable and eco-friendly than regular pads. Off-skate, they're cheaper than disposable pads, but they're more time consuming because they're meant to be washed. On-skate, they're less likely to chafe, though they're still not perfect. However, if menstrual products that are a bit more internal aren't to your liking, go for this option. Two skates out of four.

2) Tampons: far and away the most popular choice, tampons are relatively comfortable, unlikely to get jostled or moved during play, and require little effort on your part. There is the general downside of risking toxic shock syndrome if you leave the tampon in for too long, of course. For a short bout or practice, however, they're a pretty solid choice. Other concerns include cost and personal discomfort regarding the fact that when it comes down to it, the tampon is a plug and what it plugs is you. Tampons aren't for everyone, but they're easily accessible and easy to use. Three skates out of four.

3) Menstrual cups: an upcomer on the track, menstrual cups like the DivaCup are fan-frigging-tastic in my opinion. A menstrual cup is usually made out of medical-grade silicone and does not share the tampon's risk of TSS. They can be in for up to twelve hours and they do not shift around, no matter how hard you've just landed on your bum. They're also an environmentally and financially friendly choice ($40, replaced once a year), leaving you with more money in your pocket for merch and derby socks. Downsides include the learning curve - you'll need to get used to using one, but once you do, you're pretty much golden. If you're a tampon user, consider switching over. Four skates out of four.

Given that derby is a sport largely practiced by ladies, we don't often discuss our periods and how they relate to derby. Often derby culture has a sexy tough-girl attitude that doesn't leave much space for the unsexiness of having your period. While sexiness and toughness are certainly two of the things I enjoy about derby, I think it's important we not pretend that's all to which derby players amount. Famously, a South Park character once said "I don't trust anything that bleeds for a week and doesn't die." There are different kinds of tough and derby culture shouldn't ignore the kinds that don't look good in fishnets. More on that later.

In the mean time, ladies, bleed on!

Crash Into Me (And the Floor)

2011-08-22T08:30:00.016-04:00

Before / Photo: Natalie "Vegas" Buragina

During Friday night's skill testing, I had my first real crash. And I really thought I had crashed before. My favourite fall was my first as I learned how to skate, period, during which I landed so hard on my ass, I hurt my neck. But this time was different. During endurance testing, I was tired, feeling low, and pushing myself on new wheels. Being used to outdoor wheels, my new Flatouts often feel like they're always just about to roll out from under me. On Friday night, they did, just as I was turning a corner.

I flew and hit the ground, elbow first. I have never heard myself make a noise like that before. It was like the sound was ripped from my windpipe. Like the awesome women they are, my league-mates all took a knee.

By the time our health and safety committee members Killer Suenami and Avalanche got to me, I was on my front, grabbing my right shoulder and weeping. Apparently the first thing I did was apologize. Then, I asked for was a tissue because, man, was I mucus-y. Avalanche and Suenami calmed me down, got my skates off and moved me to the bench. As I sat, I said to a newcomer who had come to watch for the first time (!), "This doesn't happen often, I promise." Being a former army medic, she was not particularly off-put.

Our health and safety team put me in a sling, gave me some ibuprofen, and got me settled. Then, after practice, I went to the bar and hefted my beer with my off-hand. Later, I was checked out by a doctor and pronounced sore but largely undamaged. My rotator cuff is not having the best week. I don't have the same range of motion with my right arm as my left at the moment, but the shoulder isn't overly bruised and there's no numbness or tingling. I'm sore from my elbow to neck on my right side, but I'm taking care of myself. I'm hoping I'll be well enough to skate for next Sunday's Skate-A-Thon, though league-mates have offered to skate for me if necessary.

Health and Safety Committees are a roller derby must. LOCO is very lucky to have a nurse and aski patrol volunteer on-hand, as I found out. But every league needs a dedicated team of volunteers at practices and professional medics at bouts. We try to make derby as safe as possible and we try to ensure girls know the risks on skates. We try our absolute best to teach girls to fall safely. But if a wheel skids at the wrong time, your health and safety comes down to equipment, luck and having someone present who has the training to check your bruised body for injuries beer can't cure. Health and safety committees matter.

After / Photo Sam "Knuckle Slamwitch" Barr

"It's all downhill from your first big fall," my derby godmother, Knuckle Slamwitch of the Rollergettes, said, rendering a rather painful image. But it's true. I've crashed and cried in front of my team and now derby seems, on the whole, rather less anxiety-inducing. (Didn't kick ass on your time trial the way you wanted? Well, at least your arm isn't in a sling!) Players with more serious injuries sometimes have psychological barriers to getting back on the track, and understandably so. But as a new player, your first really jarring fall can teach you to trust yourself, to trust your gear and to enjoy the game more and worry less.

It's often said that the fear of falling is worse than the fall and short of spinal cord injuries, this is usually true. After giving some team-mates a scare (quoth Knuckle Slamwitch: "I thought you'd broken your tailbone!") and ensuring I'll be blogging gingerly for a while, I'm not afraid of the fall.

But I always, always wear my gear.

Sweet Roller Derby Charity

2011-08-19T10:09:00.000-04:00

We play sports because we want to sweat and (just maybe) excel, but we play team sports especially because we want to be part of something bigger than we are. Derby provides this on and off the track, but one of the greatest things about a league community is the charity efforts it supports. It's hard to find a league or team that doesn't support local causes in one way or another. It's no surprise one of derby's common mottoes is "Give Blood. Support Roller Derby". We're charity-minded girls, after all.

One of the ways derby distinguishes itself is the commitment to community projects. We do our best to get local brewers to sponsor us and sell their product at bouts. We run bottle drives. As we discussed last week, we donate spare gear to the league. Derby players give and not just bruises, either.

Supporting good causes does more than get our league's name and reputation out there (though it definitely does that well). It helps us cohere as a derby family. It elevates the sport we love to being something truly worthy as well as something worth-while. It shows the communities we skate in that the local derby league is a place to both hit hard and make change. It shows that derby can make the world a better place. With fishnets.

This August 28th, my league is continuing its tradition of the annual Skate-A-Thon. Every year we collect pledges with money going to both the league and a selected charity. Then we skate our bums off in Springbank Park near the Thames River and ideally, no-one gives their skates a dunk in the water. This year, we're supporting YMCA Strong Kids, a foundation that helps support children and families that can't ordinarily afford the costs of YMCA programs. In short, we're team-members helping kids get the chance to play, to make teams of their own. In the past LOCO has supported other organizations like the Canadian Mental Health Association and the Sexual Assault Centre of London. That's a league tradition to which we're still committed and I hope that commitment to community-building and good causes that derby never loses.

Did I mention you can sponsor me to skate? Ping me on Twitter if you'd like to donate!

On a side-note: new blog design (photo editing credit Matt Schneider) AND Roller Derby World Cup tickets! In celebration, I leave you with last year's Skate-A-Thon poster with an adorable skating hot dog.

Derby and Privilege

2011-08-17T09:09:00.000-04:00

Derby is a study in contrasts. Gear and skates are potentially very expensive, and the game needs room, which usually costs money. Yet it's not an elitist sport. Some leagues sponsor players for costs and basically every league has spare gear. I myself still have gear in my closet that rightly belongs to my friend Knuckle Slamwitch (of the Rollergettes). And girls will skate in sheds. They'll skate in parking lots. Give us a flat surface and we'll roll.

Derby as a sport seems to be considered something fairly without airs. We make beer-can pyramids for chicks to crash into, we value a girl's strength, speed and teamwork over wherever she comes from. That, I think, is the real reason we take derby names, because theoretically, we leave our history and privilege behind when we get on the track.

But it isn't that simple. When they're off-skate, players have widely varying opportunities to access the time and money the sport requires. I think it's the leagues we need to look to to make derby more accessible, because players are at their strongest when they work together. Time, cost and finding space are the three prime difficulties of derby, I think. And we surmount these problems by working together.

The time commitment, of course, is one of the differences between full-contact derby and low-contact derby. It's one of the reasons low-contact derby exists. Women who love the sport but can't commit to the practice schedule - for whatever reason, be it financial, personal or aught else - that full-contact requires still deserve to play.

And players who experience financial barriers deserve to play, too. Every serious sport has costs, some might say. Equipment adds up. That's true. But if derby is going to to get stronger, it needs to be more accessible. This, I think, is something both full and low-contact leagues can address. Sponsoring charities and doing community work is one of the great things about being in a derby league, but I think we should sponsor our players as well.

Having equipment is part of it. Having good equipment available in the bin is better, however. To be accessible, leagues need more spare gear and better spare gear. We should, at the very least, encourage players to donate their old gear and naturally, this option becomes more viable as a league matures. But leagues should be proactive about this as well. Buying gear specifically for the borrowing bin should be a priority. Not just yard-sale skates, of which there are some real terrors, but solid, entry-level skates and protective gear without the wear that puts players who have to borrow potentially at risk. They might be wearing something that needs to be fixed or thrown out because it's all the league can provide for them. Everyone deserves to skate safely, regardless of financial status.

I'm aware that leagues, especially young leagues have to watch their funds very carefully. But one extra fund-raising event a year (Pin the Skates on the Derby Girl!) could outfit players who will make the league stronger, who will bring in more funds and attendees at bouts once they have a chance. We could do skateathons, we could do a charity bar night (Don't Play Derby Naked!-themed, even), we could charge one dollar extra at bouts and tell the crowd exactly where that money is going. Players are the lifeblood of the sport, after all. I believe that derby players can take care of each other. The more we do so, the stronger we are.

Space, of course, is a difficulty faced primarily by the league rather than by individual players. Short of having space donated, it costs money. Even when a league has the players and practice fees available to make up the cost, even finding space can be a problem. Because of it's relatively nascent status as a sport, we lack the numbers and reputation that would mean we can assume, the way a hockey player could, that space can be found. This is a derby barrier that really only gets fixed with time and effort on the part of the league and the volunteers that make it run.

This brings me back to my admittedly slightly starry-eyed vision of derby players doing it for themselves. Our leagues run on volunteers, our leagues run on women and men donating their time and money to make the sport grow. League execs and volunteers do a lot - what we need to do is encourage and create opportunities to do more, share more of our talents and time in order to support the sport, to outfit players, to keep derby strong.

LOCO and FUCO: Never the twain shall meet?

2011-08-03T12:04:00.000-04:00

At a bar with a bunch of friends last night, I briefly bumped into a skater from our local full-contact league. I mentioned that we'd met before and named a few skaters from my league that had been there. "Oh, yeah. They do rec," she said, perhaps a little bit dismissively. Or maybe I only heard it that way.

I'd like to say first that I really like the skaters of FCDG. They do full-contact, kick-ass derby. They're smart. They're hot. I'm planning on celebrating my birthday by taking a crowd out to one of their games, because they usually bout in early October. The following is in no way a critique of FCDG or full-contact derby, because I like both of those things.

I play recreational roller derby. I play low-contact roller derby. And I play it with strong, committed women who are in LOCO because they love the sport. Some of them are moms who prefer to have a lower risk of injury because it's hard to chase after a toddler when you're on crutches. Some don't have the time to commit to the practice requirements that full-contact has for very good reasons. Some are still learning to skate and want to do so in a low-contact environment. Some transition to full-contact leagues when time and intentions permit. Some are out for the athleticism and women-positive environment and beer and just want to scrimmage. Personally, I came to LOCO not knowing how to skate, not sure how I felt about contact, not sure how much time I would be able to commit as a grad student. And, some ten months later, I love LOCO.

I love the women. I love the dudes. I love learning in a supportive environment and knowing these folk are my league-mates first and my team-mates or opposing team members second (except perhaps on the day of the actual bout, but fine). I love LOCO because I love derby.

And that's it, really. Whether you play full-contact, competitive derby or low-contact, recreational derby, you play because you love the sport. There's absolutely no reason for full-contact and low-contact leagues to not get along, to not put asses in seats on each others' bout days, to not support each other because the sport depends on strong leagues and on strong players, not on silly divisiveness.

The question seems to be whether low-contact leagues exist somehow to the detriment of full-contact leagues. Do we steal potential players? Hell no. If a player wants full-contact, she will skate towards it with a happy hip check at the ready. Do we dilute the sport? No, we spread it. We make it even more accessible, we swell the ranks of derby volunteers and players, who in my experience are as jazzed to volunteer at a LOCO game as they are to offer their services up to, say, the fabulous Rollergettes in Toronto. Is low-contact not "real" derby? Purism doesn't help the sport, because otherwise, the following starts happening: flat-track is not "real" derby" because "real" derby is on a banked track. The sport re-started in Texas in 2001 is not "real" derby because "real" derby is the co-ed endurance skating sport started in 1935. This kind of thinking is reductive and it hurts the sport and the people who play it.

Yet despite our best intentions, an awkwardness sometimes remains. Perhaps because derby sometimes feels like an outsider sport, we're leery of other derby players who don't skate with us, who don't pay dues to our league, who we haven't seen in their (or our) skivvies. I do think the split between full-contact players and low-contact players stems from things that aren't really about the health of the sport. And we're better than that - the success of roller derby as a fun, popular sport needs us to be better than that, on all sides.

Hell on Wheels - Some Thoughts

2011-07-28T16:23:00.000-04:00

Hell on Wheels is a 2007 documentary on the roller derby revival in Austin Texas, directed by Bob Ray. Originally spear-headed by "Roller Derby Dan" Policarpo, the movement quickly became appropriated by the players, an enterprising group of captains in particular. Forming Bad Girl Good Woman Productions in 2001, in the name of athletic, theatrical derby (complete with a penalty wheel with penalties such as "Reverse Spank Alley"), these captains' struggle to maintain control over the league seems to foment a later schism that leaves Austin Texas with BGGW (later TXRD Lonestar Rollergirls) and the Texas Rollergirls, a flat-track, player-operated league .

As a documentary, it's solid, certainly and gives the impression of setting forth a balanced perspective on the revival of roller derby in Texas. It feels familiar, certainly, though it doesn't labour to explain the rules of the game the way that derby movies and docs often do.

What really got me while watching the film was the sheer feeling of relief of being a member of a player-focused league that also happens to be a non-profit organization. Concerns regarding ownership and feelings of being an employee rather than a member seem to have been what really tore Texas' first derby league in two. Today, player-run flat-track leagues (with that sweet blessing, skater insurance) are basically the norm. The lack of consistent insurance is certainly one of the dangers portrayed in the film, which manages to be both a paeon to the sheer guts needed to form and successfully run a derby league and an extensive catalogue of the mistakes made in BBGW's early days. Ultimately, the film is a pretty solid endorsement of standardized organizations like WFTDA and CWRDA.

Happily, the film doesn't gloss over inter-league and extra-league conflict. This is no amazonian paradise. With that said, the film does have to tread a difficult line between not giving in to stereotypes about how women interact in groups (read: bitchily) and that aforementioned glossing over.

Similarly, the film neither revels in nor shies away from the relationship between exploitation and derby. BGGW's early days feature a lot of focus on the sexualized parts of derby and a promoter the league brings in focuses firmly on the sexiness of girl-on-girl (on-rink) action. Perhaps BBGW's lowest moment depicted in the film, aside from the loss of 65 of its 80 players, is a fundraising (lube?) oil-wrestling segment at a bar. Shown just after a meeting composed of the financially-strapped executive and players that are clearly exhausted and unhappy about fundraising downtown so close to Halloween, the sequence is off-putting rather than titillating. Players wrestle in bikinis and I have to admit that as a feminist derby player watching the sequence, I had my head in my hands.

Though I support sex workers and adult entertainers, the depiction of derby girls working for a corporation fundraising by wrestling and spanking each other for a largely male audience bothered me pretty intensely. Earlier, in what is a sadly unsurprising bit of double-think, the BGGW league had openly embraced slut-shaming, emphasizing that players should be "sexy, not slutty". Accusations of sexism and exploitation are still leveled at derby and I really value that this aspect of derby isn't a part of my derby.

Texas Rollergirls gets a lighter touch than BGGW, perhaps in my eyes because the former looks so much more like the derby I play and watch today. Egalitarian voting, emphasis on fun and athleticism rather than theatrics and long-running discussions mean a lot to a solitary player and it's what I've come to expect from my league. BGGW, in contrast, comes off a bit poorly. Unsafe skating conditions and decisions come off mostly as the mistakes of a nascent league doing something for the first time, but the film-makers clearly show the frustrations of disenfranchised players and the costs players face when skating without insurance. Even during the schism, BGGW execs tell players they need to leave the costumes and names they created (sewed, built, you name it) behind if they want out. Another sequence shows BBGW skaters showing up openly drunk to harass Texas Rollergirls players before being escorting away from security. At the same time, BGGW's remaining and new players' feelings aren't brushed aside: they feel ambushed and imitated. All of the women involved love derby; they just can't quite agree about the best way to do so.

Ultimately, Hell on Wheels is a good look at the early days of the derby revival. It's a testament to how much damn work it is to get something like this up and running. Whatever the wisdom of some of the decisions of the BGGW organizers, they certainly worked their asses off. The film wisely rests on the continuing strength of the revival, showing a derby map of the world with skaters littering the States and ranging as far as New Zealand. HoW is a great start to derby-viewing, showing the complexities of the sport-culture and how much it has changed since 2001, let alone from its previous incarnations. If you've seen derby films like Whip It! and want a little more of the sport's recent human history, certainly give it a watch.

Pride Outside

2011-07-25T13:32:00.000-04:00

I'm not a gifted outdoor skater. The last time I tried, almost a half a year prior to this week, I got to the park early, fell a lot, and slunk away just as my league showed up. It was not a sign of great things to come. This weekend, we practiced our skate-dance on Friday night, the better to boogie down King street on Sunday at London's Pride Parade.

I was concerned.

On Friday, we met at a skater's house and headed to a nearby cul-de-sac. We skated behind a Jeep, bouncing, clapping and shaking our wrist guards to Ke$ha and Gwen Stefani while some lookers-on clapped and some made drunken misogynistic noises. I fell twice, once rather mildly, and once spectacularly. I landed on an oil patch on the road, ruining my shorts and merely mildly staining my shirt. Once practice was over (and we had recalled the skater who had gone over for a drink with the misogynists and co.), I actually had to grab a shower when it because obvious that I had oil scraped up my side. Not wanting to turn our hosts' pool into a BP-style environmental incident, I cleaned up and hopped in the pool. A lovely derby party ensued. We jammed in the pool.

On Sunday, I was a bit more nervous. Skating on asphalt has always felt to me like hooking up batteries to the soles of my feet. It's like getting a particularly vibratory foot message from a stranger (i.e. the road). It's just weird. Being more used to sport court, wood, or concrete, I had to get over the sheer foot-weirdness of asphalt in order to face the bigger perils of a downtown road. London Pride went up King street, starting at the Western Fairgrounds. Initially, King Street had a gorgeous surface, but cracks soon emerged. I had a few tumbles, handed out a few suckers, and then I had my real shining moment, or rather, two of them.

Once we hit started to really get downtown, we met protesters, looking dour, holding homophobic, plainly lettered signs. Frankly, they looked bored. Much happier were the faces of the anti-protesters, holding very sweet, colourful signs saying "Love is Louder" and "I'm with Stupid". Once the protesters started to bunch up, I got shouty, exhorting the crowd to cheer if they loved pride. They did. On my third and final shout, I landed on the asphalt and apparently some of my fellow derby-folk thought I did it on purpose or that I was merely overcome with emotion. I tripped on a pot-hole. But I did so with pride in my league's willing to support our community.

My second moment was more of a tuck and roll. Throughout the march, we had been showing jumps. Our ref would skate and leap over two derby girls lying in the road, as pictured above. For our last jump, another skater got me to lie down on the asphalt with me. She stopped cleanly. I did something else. When my double knee drop failed to halt me, I tumbled and posed, legs splayed, one bent behind me. Again, the kinder folks among us assumed I was mugging for the crowd. In actuality, I wrenched my thumb and neck and had serious, if faint concerns that I had just bent my knee in a way knees were not expected to bend. Still, I rolled over and kept my head down as instructed as our ref sailed over us. It was awesome.

This was LOCO's second London Pride. We had a blast, handed out candy and fliers and let London know there's a low-contact derby league friendly to all women and men, too. Though only women are allowed to play, men are welcome to volunteer and referee. Recently, the Women's Flat-Track Derby Association officially stated that all women, whether cisgender or transgender are welcome to play derby. It's too bad this decision wasn't made earlier, but it does say a lot about our sport. Derby is a feminist, progressive sport and it's at its strongest when we're true to that.

Once the parade was over, the LOCO skaters were soaked with sweat and, almost to a person, grinning. During our practice and prep, there had been some concern that we shouldn't do Pride without a large contingent, but I think we learned that Pride is damn good fun and that what you need is heart rather than numbers. You just need skates and the willingness to get back up after you trip, or get tripped, and that's really what Pride is about: getting back up and joining hands with (or jumping over) the people you love.

99 Bottles of Beer - LOCO vs Green Rollergettes, South Simcoe Rebel Rollers vs Rollergettes

2011-07-18T01:13:00.001-04:00

Derby Lesson of the Day? If you want to know the score at the bout, don't work the beer table.

I arrived in Toronto yesterday, carrying a back-pack and a duffel bag after spending a few weeks house-sitting with my brother. I schlepped my way across the city to the George Bell arena in Toronto. After locating my buddies from LOCO, there to play a pre-game "mini-bout" against the newer members of the Rollergettes, I dumped my bags in the locker room and offered myself up to the volunteer coordinator, the lovely Jillenium Falcon. I ended up spending the evening taking beer tickets, slinging drinks and occasionally jumping to avoid broken glass from exploding beer bottles.

I can't tell you much about the pre-game 20-minute bout, save that the LOCO ladies rocked it, 34 to 20. As for the main bout between the Rollergettes and the South Simcoe Rebel Rollers, I can say even less. But here's what I can comment on - at a derby bout, the fans are thirsty, they tip well and if the beer you've poured in their cups has too much head, they'll gladly down what's left in the bottle to save you having to fill another cup, bless them.

From a high corner in the humid George Bell arena, I saw sweaty, fantastic derby girls - South Simcoe looked tough and hot in their black tees, the Rollergettes looked home-team confident in purple, white and green, and LOCO showed the crowd that low-contact still means an exciting game. I saw equally sweaty fans, cheering the players and routinely coming back for more beer, and paramedics coming to snag some of our ice.

Our set-up was simple. We had a tub of ice and three kinds of beer courtesy of Great Lakes Brewery. Fans' choices included Golden Horseshoe Lager, Orange Peel Ale and Green Tea Ale, all of which were godsends in the hot arena. The crowd favoured Horseshoe all night, but Green Tea made significant gains as word of mouth spread. A valiant fan lent us his bottle opener when our original was proving a bit lackadaisical and I made enough tip money to buy a South Simcoe t-shirt (thanks, Toronto!).

Notable happenings: beer exploded. Two bottles of Green Tea Ale popped without warning; one, in the ice-bin and one all over the floor. A sweet fan fished out most of the broken glass from the bin, mindful of my poor fingers, which are currently band-aided. My injuries (bout beats of a kind, to be sure) are mostly limited to some cuts and blisters from frequent ice baths, sharp bottle caps, and the general business of opening beer bottles for four hours.

So what did I learn last night? Derby is a family game and derby is a hard game. One guy is there strictly for beer and hotpants while the patron behind him dandles an adorable child over his tattooed arm. Cute hipsters stalk the arena and sweet dresses are often in evidence. People who love derby embrace all of it, from the hits to the sweat to the sequins.

Derby Lesson of the Day #2: If volunteering, always put your cell phone in the pocket less likely to get beer and ice-water repeatedly poured on it.

After my (awesome) shift, I got a Green Tea Ale for myself (it tasted like ginseng and danger) and finished 650 ml of beer in about two minutes. I congratulated my friend and LOCO alumnus Knuckle Slamwitch on her win and a kick-ass jam and then caught a ride back to London with my league-mate Avalanche. We got lost on the way into London, but my night ended, as I like it to, safely in my partner's bed.

I'm proud to have had my first bout as a volunteer. Derby bouts are electric and it takes hard work on and off-skate to make it happen. I was thoroughly impressed by both the volunteers and players brought in by LOCO, South Simcoe and the Rollergettes. Next time, whether my shirt is soaked in sweat or beer, I know to look forward to the quality crowd derby brings out.

And I'll know a bout is nothing if there isn't flying glass.

Quick Links and a Derby Update

2011-07-11T12:21:00.000-04:00

I found this today: http://quick-brown-fox-canada.blogspot.com/. It's a great blog, absolutely bursting with resources for writers, ranging from literary agent listings to contest information. Not to be missed!

Also, two literary agent listings: Literary Agent Listings from the Writer's Union of Canada

National Literary Agent Listing from Publishers.ca

In other news, I'm taking some time off-skate, but I'm delighted to be volunteering at The Rollergettes' Rockin' Rollin' Ruckus on July 16th, in Toronto, ON. LOCO will be playing a pre-bout low-contact game at George Bell Arena, 215 Ryding Avenue, Toronto. Tickets can be snagged at

Shox's Sports Saloon - Junction, Dundas & Keele
Good Catch - Parkdale, Queen West (@Sorauren)
Freshly Baked Tees - 557 Queen Street West (e. of Spadina)
The Mascot - Parkdale, Queen West (w. of Dufferin)
Hell's Belles - 463 Queen Street West (w. of Spadina)

Look for my blog of the event on the 17th, if you can't join us the night before!

Loser, Baby.

2011-06-25T18:28:00.001-04:00

My hard drive is dead. Intensely dead. Parrot in a Monty Python sketch dead. This means my easy access to my thesis written under the guidance of Jane Urquhart and my previous work is no more.

The work itself lives on, I hope. I'll be spending the next few days scouring my half-unpacked apartment for any usb keys, my email for sent attachments, and the hearts and inboxes of friends and family for rough work and sympathy. At the very least, I have a hardcover copy of the thesis, so I didn't actually cry when the guy at Best Buy confirmed my fears. I have noticed that since then I have strange aches as if I've been clenching with grief and Luddite rage, which I probably have. The guy at the counter confided his own hard drive had died earlier this week and that he had no less than six external hard drives at home.
On the positive side, once the computer comes back and I obsessively back up my files as they come back / start anew, I have a lot of gigabytes to fill. I feel energized both by my panic and the kick-ass pencil skirt I bought from Weezi in the belief that after paying the equivalent of my rent in repairs and equipment, a) one sweet skirt will probably kick up my words per minute and b) my budget is reeling drunkenly already, so why not?

In the mean time, I have some outbox scavenging to do, Mad Max-style. I'll give my external hard drive a mohawk to get in the spirit of things.

Writing Desks, Tree Branches and a Cave of One's Own

2011-06-16T21:11:00.000-04:00

Sadly, not everyone who writes has a hermitage, so we make do with dens, coffee-shops and frequently in my case, my couch or bed. These last were nominally comfortable, but the longer I wrote the more pronounced the curl of my spine became, so I took the plunge and rolled off the couch. It's only recently that I've made the switch to a desk. It has drawers. It has good light. It looks sturdy enough to support a mug of tea.

My ideal writing place would be a comfortable tree branch, but since my handwriting is messy at best and my laptop and collar-bone are surprisingly fragile, I've decided on this particular perch.

My other options below the level of branches were limited. I have friends who go to write in coffee-shops and university libraries, both of which I find far too crowded and heady with caffeinated people. Having recently moved to an apartment, I'm sadly without a back-yard (inhumane though it would be in winter). My new living room is certainly out of bounds, because my room-mate doesn't to hear that much cursing as she's trying to read (except when I'm playing video games, of course, in which case I howl loud enough for the neighbours to hear). Our kitchen table is covered in plants and I like them where they are, so the desk was my only option. I was unsure at first, as my last foray into desks involved a deep alcove that made me feel like a bat with bad spatial orientation.

There's something romantic about a wooden desk, though, especially a second-hand one. This one has been pretty bumped about for such a little desk and most of the drawers won't fit a regulation printer page, which suits me fine. The drawer handles are bronze-coloured metal and they are so small they will only fit one finger. I picked it up at a second-hand shop in the East Village for $35 and I like to think it's the veteran of the two of us in a writing game.

Then again, if I found an Ikea sticker on the back, I wouldn't be heart-broken. If I can't have a tree branch, I'll swing on this. It's sturdy and most of my printer fits on it.

Upcoming: back on (the) track for derby practice!

On Love, Enthusiasm, and Falling on Your Ass

2011-05-13T23:02:00.000-04:00

I'm a quitter. I always have been. If I couldn't grasp something quickly, I often abandoned it. It's because of this that I still don't know how to ride a bike or drive a car, though both skills are ones I hope to attain this summer. In high school, I stopped taking Math and Gym as soon as I could, focusing on classes that came easily, like English. Geography remains my greatest and shortest shame from that period. I am not talented at colouring maps and possibly never will be.

I think derby is one of the first activities, if not the very first, that I have loved without being immediately good at. I fall a lot. I skid. I swear every time I make a mistake. I think that on the track, I resemble nothing so much as a flailing waterfowl in striped socks. Despite that, I haven't quit. And I've considered it. Back when my anxiety was worse, I would literally not be able to get out of the car before practice if I was a mere two minutes late. I missed a lot of practices that way.

The fact of the matter remains that no matter how bruised my thighs are or dented my pride is, I love derby. I love the feel of my wheels rolling under my feet, Hermes-like on my good runs. I love falling and getting up, even when my legs shake underneath me. I love the grace and badassery of the women on the track who are my inspiration and the objects of my occasional fits of jealousy ("Why can't I skate like that?"). Derby has taught me how to love something I am not good at.

It's derby, in some ways, that I have to thank for the possibility that I might actually learn how to ride a bike at the age of twenty-three. Previous attempts have been made, but they were half-hearted. They were made tense by fear. It's only now that I've learned not to be quite so afraid of failure. And that's where the enthusiasm comes in. I don't get a masochistic thrill from making an ass of myself, but I'll do it with gusto. The last few months have in some ways been the process of relearning what I was taught on my first day on skates. I'm still trying to fall correctly and be confident enough to do so with startling frequency, trusting my knee pads to take the worst of it.

This logic won't apply so well behind the steering wheel of a car, mind you, but I have at least until August to think of a better analogy.

New Skates!

2011-05-04T18:47:00.000-04:00

Photo credit to Rollergirl.ca

Today's post is all about new skates. Taking advantage of Rollergirl.ca's spring sale, I got my first pair of brand new skates. They are Riedell 265s, similar to those seen above, though mine have royal blue Flatouts, China Bones REDS bearings and a Suregrip toe-stop.

After giddily unpacking them and attaching my toe snouts (as my landlord repaired my window-ledge and presumably wondered what I was doing with that wrench), I wore them while working on my laptop, in order to get a feel for the boot. Last night, I took them out for a spin, whereupon they punished me brutally. I also did several superman slides without my elbow pads on. That actually wasn't their fault so much.

The wet sock method has been suggested for the purpose of breaking in the skates, but I think I'll just give them time. After several months of skating on a used pair, I want to be as careful with these as possible, with the awareness that derby is brutal on skates anyway. I was skating on an old pair of Riedell Torqs, which are solid skates, but were a bit small for me, with indoor/outdoor wheels. I'm figuring out whether to donate them to the league or keep them as an outdoor pair I don't mind getting banged up. It would be nice to keep them in the family, since they're another player's old skates.

Derby practice is tomorrow night, so I think I'll spend my evening wearing my skates, editing, and occasionally marveling at how well the new bearings roll. It will be very academic.

Readings, House of Anansi, Roller Derby, and Government Funding

2011-04-29T22:44:00.000-04:00

It's been an eventful week.

On Monday, I read at the end of year shindig for the graduates of U of T's Master's in English and Creative Writing. It went splendidly and someone mistook Jane Urquhart for my aunt. I think that's an excellent sign of a first-rate mentor. My fellows were smart, engaging, and talented. I will want their books signed someday.

More recently, I went to House of Anansi Press' launch of three poetry titles. Standing with some friends and avoiding the occasional broken glass, I heard Ken Babstock read from Methodist Hatchet, Sharon Thesen read from Oyama Pink Shale, and Matt Rader from A Doctor Pedalled Her Bicycle Over the River Arno. I also had some really excellent macaroni and cheese at the Victory Cafe, but the poetry was equally surprising, especially when Ken Babstock used the phrase "chicken-rapist" and made the room titter.

In derby news, I've ordered new skates and I've started to learn how to do cross-overs. Having a partner who played a lot of hockey has definite advantages.

LOCO London, my league, is having their first bout this Sunday. Check the site here. Working together with the Sexual Assault Center of London, LOCO has opened up last-minute tickets for both self-defense classes and a rocking bout. I've seen these women skate and it's going to be gorgeous.

Finally, I finally checked my mail and I have a SSHRC CGS for the next three years of my PhD. I couldn't be more delighted to go to school this autumn with such great financial support.

In the mean-time, I'll be working on my cross-overs.

Reading in Toronto and on the Web

2011-04-23T17:40:00.000-04:00

This Monday, April 25th, my fellow graduates of the University of Toronto's M.A. in English and Creative Writing and I will be reading at the Supermarket restaurant and bar in Kensington. The readers are seven young writers, all with gumption and talent.

Event Details: End of Year Reading - Creative Writing M.A. 2011
Supermarket Restaurant and Bar
268 Augusta Avenue
Toronto, Ontario
7:00 p.m. to 10:00 p.m.
Readings by Meghan Adams, Brendan Bowles, Elin Hellmark-Kristofferson, Kasia Juno, George Pakozdi, Annie Russell and Andrew Sullivan. Intermission performance by Kasia Juno.

The restaurant's event page is here.
The Facebook group is here.

Best of all? Watch it online here at 7:00 p.m. Eastern on Monday night! You will need a Facebook account. Otherwise, you'll need to drive to Toronto.

It's my first public reading. I plan on wearing sturdy shoes.

Thesis Defended!

2011-04-20T15:56:00.000-04:00

My thesis defense for the Master's in English and Creative Writing at the University of Toronto has concluded successfully! Dr Marlene Goldman as the departmental representative, my mentor Jane Urquhart and Michael Winter (acting as the committee head) all gave great feedback on the collection of short stories I did. Hopefully, I'll get more feedback from Jeff Parker and Rosemary Sullivan when they are available/in the country.

I am very excited and celebrating with chocolate and the prospect of video games once I'm home.

Next up: meetings with Jane and Michael to discuss how one courts an agent.

Huzzah!

For Crying Out Loud 2

2011-04-03T18:01:00.000-04:00

This is long overdue, but I'm happy to mention that I've been published in For Crying Out Loud 2, the third release from Ferno House, a Toronto-based micropress publishing house. For Crying Out Loud 2, like its predecessor is a collection of fiction and poetry by current and former students of the University of Toronto's Master's in English and Creative Writing. This includes fine friends like Andrew Sullivan, Annie Russell, Brendan Bowles and Andrew MacDonald, who blogs here. And my contribution was poetry, rather unusually for me.

The launch was on March 24th. Copies are still available, I believe. Contact the fine folks of Ferno House if you want a limited edition featuring writers, several of whom are either up, coming, or both.

Thesis is in!

2011-04-02T09:50:00.000-04:00

Officially, my creative writing thesis for the University of Toronto's Master's in English and Creative Writing has been submitted to the department! Written under Jane Urquhart's excellent supervision, it's a collection of twelve stories. We'll see yet what the department, including Michael Winter, Rosemary Sullivan and Jeff Parker, makes of it. The rest of my cohort have submitted their own monsters and made merry. Huzzahs all around.

This nascent blog, of course, is the next part.

Fresh From the CBC Literary Awards

2011-04-02T09:32:00.000-04:00

On March 24th, the CBC Literary Awards were announced and I won first prize for the Bob Weaver Fiction Prize! I won for a story entitled "Snapshots from my Father's Euthanasia Road Trip, or, Esau" which be appear in AirCanada's in-flight magazine, EnRoute. Clearly, I'm as excited as at least two pigs in muck.

My profile on the CBC Literary Awards (along with an excerpt of the story) can be found here: CBC Literary Awards 2010: Meghan Adams